Post by Jesse Styles on Feb 24, 2015 0:48:01 GMT -6
Go Fuck Yourself
As the scene unfolds, we’re met with a with a shot of the N.E.W Ignite Arena. Large banners hanging from the rafters decorated the arena. On these banners were the likeness of past and present members of New Edge Wrestling alike who have helped shape this company into the long standing force it has become over the years with the words “IGNITE 200” emblazoned across each one.
Vince Walters: “LADIES AND GENTLEMENT, BOYS AND GIRLS, WELCOME TO IGNITE 200!!!”
Jill Matthews: “Yessss oh wow it’s been a long time coming but we’ve finally made it through thick and thin to this milestone episode of N.E.W’s game changing show and man do we have a show for you!”
Vince Walters: “That’s right my buxom friend, because tonight we get to see some of this company’s top talent take part in the Battle for Chicago match from the sears tower for a chance to compete for the NEW Heavyweight Championship title..”
Jill Matthews: “Also taking place tonight is going to be a Tag Team Grudge Match between the team of NEW Owner Jesse Styles & Ricky Cassells and Al Envy with the return of L.A Johnny Stylez!!!”
Vince Walters: “...and if that wasn’t enough, tonight in the Main Event N.E.W World Heavyweight Champion Blair Buchannan-Valentyne will have to defend her title for the first time against not one, not two, but three hungry competitors in a Fatal Fourway against Father Nathan, Valora Salinas, and her estranged husband Hunter Valentyne!”
Jill Matthews: “ ….and to make things interesting, tonight in the Main Event we have New Edge newcomer Rob Riot as a special guest referee!”
Vince Walters: “Speaking of the World Champ, Blair Buchannan-Valentyne is expected to make an appearance today at the top of the show …”
Jill Matthews: “That’s right, I saw something on her twitter account about how she’s planning on making love to the World Champion??? But she is the World Champion...does that mean she’s going to have sex with herself? And in the middle of the ring? Nobody wants to see that!”
Vince Walters: “Speak for yourself, woman!...it looks like you might be on to something though, because there’s an actual BED set up in the middle of the ring!”
Immediately after Vince says that, the camera pans to a shot of the ring and indeed there is a large bed set up in the middle of it. The bed is draped in red silk sheets with a few plush looking heart shaped pillows. Next to the bed is a small night stand with a bottle of champagne chilled in an ice bucket with an empty champagne flute next to it. The ring itself had lots of red rose petals scattered all over it.
"Fuck Love" by Iggy Azalia hits the PA speakers and the screens light up with videos of Blair Buchannan-Valentyne's career and match highlights. As soon as the beat drops, the crowd is on their feet giving out an absolutely electric vibe as a mixture of cheers and boos reach almost a deafening level.
Soon enough, Blair makes her way out onto the stage and just when you thought the crowd couldnt get any louder, they do. Blair is followed out onto the stage my Sandi & Mandi, the NEW cheerleaders and Blair’s sometime-henchwomen. Blair is dressed in a simple red silk mini robe that is tied shut, and a pair of red glittery high heeled stilettos. Over one shoulder is the N.E.W Heavyweight Championship title belt.
Tom Davis: “Ladies and gentlemen please welcome to the ring accompanied by Sandi & Mandi…. the N.E.W World Heavyweight Champion...Blair Buchannan-Valentyne!”
Standing at the edge of the stage, Blair looks around at the crowd triumphantly before signalling for her lackey’s to stay behind. Then, upon being announced Blair struts down the ramp toward the ring.
Vince Walters: “Oh boy oh boy oh boy!!!”
Jill Matthews: “This isn’t seriously happening, is it?”
Blair eventually makes her way into the ring and holds up the World Title with that trademark alligator grin of hers. She places it gently on the bed behind her before grabbing the microphone from Tom Davis as her music dies down.
Blair Buchannan-Valentyne: “Ignite 200…..”
Blair pauses for a moment because, after the mere mention of these words, the crowd becomes ecstatic.
Blair Buchannan-Valentyne: “I’ve worked very hard to get here today, standing in this ring in front of all of you as the World Champion….”
Jill Matthews: “Oh please, she hasn’t worked a day in her life.”
Vince Walters: “Be careful what you say...that’s our World Champ you’re talking about.”
Jill Matthews: “So? I’m not afraid of her!”
Blair Buchannan-Valentyne: “....Now it’s no secret that I’ve had a thing for having sex with the World Champions and that I’ve got a serious thing for power….but standing here today in front of the world as the champion i’ve got to say that i’ve NEVER felt hornier in my entire life….”
Vince Walters: “Oh my God…”
Jill Matthews: “Just gross. She has no class. No class at all.”
Vince Walters: “You tell her, Backdoor Slut volume 3 and 4.”
Blair Buchannan-Valentyne: “...and since I’M the world champion and since MY celebration was cut short by somebody who shall remain nameless….”
The crowd started a ‘Val’s Gonna kill You’ chant to Blair’s dismay. She rolled her eyes and ignored them.
Blair Buchannan-Valentyne: “I figured what better place to celebrate than right here tonight on Ignite 200 by making sweet sweet love to ME….the NEW World Heavyweight Champion?!”
With that, Blair sauntered over to the ice bucket and poured herself a glass of champagne. She downed the glass in one sip and tossed the champagne flute out into the crowd.
Then, Blair slowly slipped in between the sheets of the bed. She slipped out of the robe, tossing it out of the ring and covered herself with the sheets from the chest down. Then, with one hand on the World title and the other ...um….under the sheets, it appeared as Blair began to ….actually…..go to town on herself.
Vince Walters: “This is the best day of my life. I love my job!!!”
Jill Matthews: “This is disgusting. Somebody put a stop to this. Blair Buchannan is a disgrace to this company and a disgrace to that title!”
Vince Walters: “Shut up! Shut up!!!”
Blair began to moan and groan while apparently pleasuring herself on the bed in the ring. The crowd was hysterical with mixtures of cheers and boos and some not making any noise out of sheer confusion.
Finally, it seemed as though the crowd reached a deafening level of noise but not because of what Blair was doing in the ring. Valora Salinas walked out onto the stage looking absolutely livid.
Jill Matthews: “FINALLY!”
Vince Walters: “Maybe she wants to join in!”
Jill Matthews: “Yeah, I doubt it.”
Sandi and Mandi stood at the end of the stage, arms linked, aiming to stop Valora from interfering. Valora just smirked and ran at the two, taking them down with a double clothesline with very little effort required. The crowd went crazy.
Vince Walters: “Uh oh!!”
Jill Matthews: “She’s not playing around. Get her, Val! Put a stop to this madness!!!”
Standing up then, Valora charges down the ramp like a rabid wolf on a mission. Blair, seeing Valora on the attack has a choice to make.
Jill Matthews: “That dumb bitch isn’t taking the hint. Why isn’t she running away?!”
Vince Walters: “It looks like she’s trying to finish herself off! Valora’s already ruined her moment once, it looks like Blair isn’t going to let that be a repeat performance.”
Valora slides into the ring and gets ready to pummell Blair into oblivion but right as she approaches the bed, Blair tosses her head back and darts her legs into the air while flinging the sheets off of her.
Jill Matthews: “Oh no..I think she’s gonna…”
Vince Walters: “Holy shit! Valora watch out!”
But it’s too late. As Val approaches the bed she is met with a mighty stream of Blair’s she-jizz.
Vince Walters: “She’s a squirter! Blair Buchannan-Valentyne is a squirter!!!”
Jill Matthews: “oh….my God…..”
Blair finally calms down after achieving what looked like the most intense orgasm of her life. Coming to, she sees Valora standing in front of the bed. Blair realizes that she does NOT looking happy.
Valora stands there, her face sopping wet,, staring daggers through Blair who slowly climbs off of the bed and puts her robe back on. Valora walks up to Blair, who is backing up away from her until her back is up against the ropes and she can go no further.
Jill Matthews: “She’s gonna get it now!”
After staring Blair down for what seems like forever, Valora darts her face forward and spits a hefty mouthfull of Blair’s own ‘fluids’ back into her face!!!!!
Vince Walters: “SHE WAS SAVING IT!!! SHE SAVED IT!!! OH MY GOD!!!! I THINK BLAIR’S MOUTH WAS OPEN!!!”
She sheer force of the jet stream knocked Blair back a little, allowing Val to grab Blair by the neck and toss her backward onto the bed. Blair, thinking quickly, grabbed onto the World Title and slipped out of the ring before Valora could inflict any more damage. Blair stumbled up the ramp as Valora gripped onto the ropes, screaming obscenities at Blair who was helped backstage by Sandi and Mandi.
Vince Walters: “That….was….amazing!”
Jill Matthews: “...well...what can I say?....welcome to Ignite 200 everybody…..”