Post by Jesse Styles on Mar 10, 2013 19:05:56 GMT -6
Segment Title: “The Lotion”
Participants: Jarek Whitaker, Matt Slater
Our cameras are rolling backstage as we see..well, we see the rear end of someone who's bent over a table, filling out documents. Only made noticeable by the sound of the ball point pen making contact with the wooden surface. Suddenly, out of left field (Literally), a massive bulge beneath a trench coat presses right against this person's bum. This causes them to jump, turn around, and back up against the table. Our mystery ass belongs to none other than Jarek Whitaker as he receives a nice pop from the crowd on hand. Sporting a black T which reads "Fat Chicks Rule..." on the front of it.
The bulge that had nearly violated Jarek now inches closer, revealing it to be an 'extension' of Spaz. He is dressed in a long, beige trench coat with a matching fedora, though easily recognizable through his guise. He removes a hand from his coat pocket and points at Jarek, who still has a somewhat bewildered expression on his face.
Spaz: "Jare Bear...Got any lotion?"
After inquiring, Spaz extends his hand as if he were waiting on Jarek to hand him a bottle. Instead, Whitaker shakes his head, followed by a brief chuckle.
Jarek Whitaker: "Sorry, broski. I'm fresh out..."
He says, now scanning the area to try and find some method of deterring Spaz. Jarek grins as he points farther down the hallway.
Jarek Whitaker: "But you know, I bet that dude has some."
Spaz calmly places his hand back in his coat pocket and leaves Jarek. A couple moments later, we find the backside of another person. This one belongs to someone who's sifting through their training bag. Once more, Spaz's flesh spear nearly pierces them from behind, which garners the same reaction as before. This time, however, It's none other than Matt Slater. He gets an even larger pop from the audience as he seems just as startled as Jarek was.
Matt Slater: "Can I help you with something?"
Matt questions, but Spaz doesn't respond right away. Instead he removes a hand from his pocket and points at Matt, who lifts an eyebrow in response.
Spaz: "Slaytor.. Got any lotion?"
Slater cocks his head to the side.
Matt Slater: "Lotion? Why would you.."
Suddenly realizing who he was talking to, Matt cringes and turns away from Spaz.
Matt Slater: "Nevermind, don't answer that."
He too now looks for someone to pawn Spaz and his odd shenanigans off on. An even bigger grin than Whitaker's now plays on his face, as if he'd found that someone.
Matt Slater: "Now that guy down there.." He points even farther down the corridor. "I know for a fact that he has some!"
Spaz claps in excitement, hardly able to contain himself (Or the huge erection beneath his coat). Matt gives him a thumbs up then pats him on his back as Spaz walks off. A couple of seconds pass as it registers once more who he just made contact with. Slater frantically wipes his hand off on his pant leg as the cameras are back on Spaz again.
He continues on his journey to find lotion, for some reason that's probably disturbing AND unnatural. Spaz passes a few vending machines and is now just a couple strides behind NEW owner, Jesse Styles. The arena goes into a frenzy of boos upon seeing him. Jesse is wearing a shit eating grin and strutting like he'd just been dubbed King of the World.
Spaz removes both hands from his coat and jogs up behind Jesse. He taps him on the right shoulder as Styles looks to his right to acknowledge it, but before he can see Spaz quickly shifts to the left of him and leans in at his side.
Spaz: "HEY, CUE BALL! Got any lotion?"
Jesse lets out a sigh. His facial expression says it all. Spaz was the last person he wanted to see right now.
Jesse: "Spaz..what the hell do you want?"
He asks as they continue walking.
Spaz: "I want lotion. Give me some."
Jesse: "Well I don't have any, so piss off."
Spaz: "It puts the lotion on, Jesse."
Jesse's pace quickens but so does Spaz’s. He keeps repeating himself over and over again, saying "It puts the lotion on, Jesse." Styles’ patience quickly depleting. Finally, he stops just before a busy intersection. Jesse turns and grabs Spaz by the collar of his jacket, pulling him closer.
Jesse: "Look, I don't have any fucking lotion! Now go away, Spaz!"
Jesse releases his grip and rounds the corner, disappearing from sight. Spaz hesitates for a moment before shrugging. He jogs around the corner as we then hear him yell out..
Spaz: "It puts the lotion on, Jesse! It puts it on or it gets the hose!"
Followed with Jesse, also screaming at the top of his lungs.
Jesse: "Shut the hell up already!"
Our feed cuts to a commercial break shortly thereafter.
Participants: Jarek Whitaker, Matt Slater
Our cameras are rolling backstage as we see..well, we see the rear end of someone who's bent over a table, filling out documents. Only made noticeable by the sound of the ball point pen making contact with the wooden surface. Suddenly, out of left field (Literally), a massive bulge beneath a trench coat presses right against this person's bum. This causes them to jump, turn around, and back up against the table. Our mystery ass belongs to none other than Jarek Whitaker as he receives a nice pop from the crowd on hand. Sporting a black T which reads "Fat Chicks Rule..." on the front of it.
The bulge that had nearly violated Jarek now inches closer, revealing it to be an 'extension' of Spaz. He is dressed in a long, beige trench coat with a matching fedora, though easily recognizable through his guise. He removes a hand from his coat pocket and points at Jarek, who still has a somewhat bewildered expression on his face.
Spaz: "Jare Bear...Got any lotion?"
After inquiring, Spaz extends his hand as if he were waiting on Jarek to hand him a bottle. Instead, Whitaker shakes his head, followed by a brief chuckle.
Jarek Whitaker: "Sorry, broski. I'm fresh out..."
He says, now scanning the area to try and find some method of deterring Spaz. Jarek grins as he points farther down the hallway.
Jarek Whitaker: "But you know, I bet that dude has some."
Spaz calmly places his hand back in his coat pocket and leaves Jarek. A couple moments later, we find the backside of another person. This one belongs to someone who's sifting through their training bag. Once more, Spaz's flesh spear nearly pierces them from behind, which garners the same reaction as before. This time, however, It's none other than Matt Slater. He gets an even larger pop from the audience as he seems just as startled as Jarek was.
Matt Slater: "Can I help you with something?"
Matt questions, but Spaz doesn't respond right away. Instead he removes a hand from his pocket and points at Matt, who lifts an eyebrow in response.
Spaz: "Slaytor.. Got any lotion?"
Slater cocks his head to the side.
Matt Slater: "Lotion? Why would you.."
Suddenly realizing who he was talking to, Matt cringes and turns away from Spaz.
Matt Slater: "Nevermind, don't answer that."
He too now looks for someone to pawn Spaz and his odd shenanigans off on. An even bigger grin than Whitaker's now plays on his face, as if he'd found that someone.
Matt Slater: "Now that guy down there.." He points even farther down the corridor. "I know for a fact that he has some!"
Spaz claps in excitement, hardly able to contain himself (Or the huge erection beneath his coat). Matt gives him a thumbs up then pats him on his back as Spaz walks off. A couple of seconds pass as it registers once more who he just made contact with. Slater frantically wipes his hand off on his pant leg as the cameras are back on Spaz again.
He continues on his journey to find lotion, for some reason that's probably disturbing AND unnatural. Spaz passes a few vending machines and is now just a couple strides behind NEW owner, Jesse Styles. The arena goes into a frenzy of boos upon seeing him. Jesse is wearing a shit eating grin and strutting like he'd just been dubbed King of the World.
Spaz removes both hands from his coat and jogs up behind Jesse. He taps him on the right shoulder as Styles looks to his right to acknowledge it, but before he can see Spaz quickly shifts to the left of him and leans in at his side.
Spaz: "HEY, CUE BALL! Got any lotion?"
Jesse lets out a sigh. His facial expression says it all. Spaz was the last person he wanted to see right now.
Jesse: "Spaz..what the hell do you want?"
He asks as they continue walking.
Spaz: "I want lotion. Give me some."
Jesse: "Well I don't have any, so piss off."
Spaz: "It puts the lotion on, Jesse."
Jesse's pace quickens but so does Spaz’s. He keeps repeating himself over and over again, saying "It puts the lotion on, Jesse." Styles’ patience quickly depleting. Finally, he stops just before a busy intersection. Jesse turns and grabs Spaz by the collar of his jacket, pulling him closer.
Jesse: "Look, I don't have any fucking lotion! Now go away, Spaz!"
Jesse releases his grip and rounds the corner, disappearing from sight. Spaz hesitates for a moment before shrugging. He jogs around the corner as we then hear him yell out..
Spaz: "It puts the lotion on, Jesse! It puts it on or it gets the hose!"
Followed with Jesse, also screaming at the top of his lungs.
Jesse: "Shut the hell up already!"
Our feed cuts to a commercial break shortly thereafter.