Post by Deleted on Aug 15, 2019 13:23:43 GMT -6
Ever reach a point in your life where things are spiraling out of control so quickly and so harshly you don’t have the time to properly process and work it out mentally all you can do is react to whatever shit the monkeys of fate throw at you? Then when you finally do have a moment of something that resembles peace where you are actually able to think rational thoughts and reflect on the shit that has happened and what your options are moving forward, you reach the unfortunate conclusion that your choices were poor and your actions even poorer and shit has gotten so unbelievably
That it’s too late to go back, and you’ve reached the point where toast can never be bread again! And eventhough you never meant for things to get so phucked up, the fact is they are and you can’t take a single word or thing you did back. So the only hope you have is the hopefully choose the right course of action and hope that one day you will reach a point where forgiveness is an option, but even that thought is the furthest thing away from a guarantee so really all you can do is try and not phuck it up even worse and learn to live in the new shit world you created for yourself? Soundz phuckin
I know, I know one of the reason most of the people who despise me, and I mean really phucking despise me do so from a place of pure, unmistakable, sweet, and sexy
..And its all because I am literally the ABSOLUTE BEST AT WHAT I DO, and also I just so happen to be
And because of that I get paid ridiculous amounts of money, which only opens more doors for me and has allowed me to get away with way more than someone like me should ever be allowed to get away with! So yeah don’t think when I walk from behind that curtain every phucking night and hear the collective voices of a sold out crowd yelling every curse and obscenity in the book (and a few that aren’t) my way that I don’t know and appreciate why! And I won’t sit here and lie to any of you that right there is part of the reason I absolutely LOVE being
Former SeVeN TiME HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION OF THE WORLD! THE ONLY REAL BLACKOUT CHAMPION IN THE HISTORY OF NEW, 14 Pay Per View Main Events, and some of the most memorable moments this business has or will ever know! And that’s just in NEW, I could literally keep going (and part of me really phucking wantz to), but I just brought all of that up just now to make one phucking thing very
And while most of you faceless, irrelevant, probably inbred MORONZ who sit behind your computer screen and talk shit without the fear of getting your phucking face smashed for voicing your irrelevant opinion to the world about subjects and people you know
Because yes you tune in every week and you see the arrogant smirk and you hear the sharp jagged insults that cut my opponents so deep they become disoriented and foolish, which in turn makes them easy phucking PREY! Like almost to the phuckin point where it aint even FAIR! Like playing
But you don’t actually know a phucking thing about me! You don’t know who I am or where I come from! Shit half of you morons probably don’t even know that Jesse and I aren’t even really blood related! And even for those of you that do know and have read my bio knowing I was adopted when I was eleven by Jesse’s Father’s Brother his name was Jimmy! Ha there’s a name I haven’t thought about in forever! But a name and a face I couldn’t get out of my head as the ambulance finally pulled up to the hospital after Ignite went off the air and I was on the receiving end of one of the most vicious and passionate beatings my cousin has ever dealt to anyone!
And yet despite the fact that I could feel myself slipping in and out of consciousness, I couldn’t stop thinking about my life, NEW, the match that is supposed to take place this weekend, and how we managed to let shit get so phucked up between us that we wound up here! And as the nurse stuck her needle into my skin stitching the gaping holes the chair shots Jesse gave me left on my dome part of it really phucking bothered me! Because we had pulled this kinda crap on each other on more than one occasion, but this time…Ha, this phucking time was
And as everyone knows there is only one thing war actually guarantees anyone who fights in them and that my friends is
And of all the times in the world why I had to phucking feel this way and think about this crap right now is phucking beyond me…It was actually kinda pissing me off, because all of thus…EVERY PHUCKING BIT OF IT IS COMPLETLEY THAT SHORT SIGHTED, TWO FACED, EYE BROWLESS, HEEYYYY YOU GUYS RETARDED ASSHAT
He turned his back on me after I promised him to do what I have always done and that’s put his company on my back and bring it beyond any boundary or heights we had seen before. But he didn’t like that because this time I was set on doing it the hard way! THE RIGHT PHUCKING WAY! So where in the phucking phuck he gets off CALLING ME THE COWARD, ME THE PHUCKING BACKSTABBER, IS ABSOLUTLEY JUST
!!!!F’N BEYONNNNDDD ME!!!!
That has been the part that has baffled me literally this entire time! And I know for a fact that is how I wound up a bloody phucking mess with staples and stitches on at least three parts of my head and face! But like I said before why does this keep happening? Why do we always wind up back here some how? Because everytime we get into it the punches get harder, the insults more personal, and the wounds much deeper! I guess when I saw him over a month ago when he sprung me from Orleans Parish Prison to tell me that he was doing the one thing in the world I wanted more than anything, I just wanted it to be different! I wanted to keep my word! But right now JESUS I just want some phuckin OPIATES! NURSE BRING ME SOME PHUCKIN PAIN MEDS…WHATEVER YOU GOT THAT IS STRONGER THAN MORPHINE MY SHIT IS KILLING ME!!!
Conrad Thompson: Wait hold on a second PHUCKSTICK, keep your word what in the phuck are you talking about?
Just then the scene opens up and we see The Paragona of Americana finally in a hospital room still in his ring attire with dry blood crusting up on his face, his eye is black and he looks like a complete and total can of SMASHED ASS! Sitting in the room with him is none other than beloved professional wrestling podcaster Conrad Thompson who heard NEW was reopening and has been joining Johnny Stylez on the road listening to his stories and hearing about his career as they planned to release a docu-series, and there was even talk of a book at some point. But either way Conrad knew Johnny getrs a little truthful when he is full of opiates and well he didn’t have anything better to do…But right when the story was getting a little juicy he could see Johnny was still fading in and out…So the nurse came in with a syringe and walked right up to his IV and went to inject it before Conrad stopped her.
Conrad: Mam I know you are just doin your job, but if you could just wait literally five seconds he was just about to explain something very important…
Johnny hauled off and backhanded Conrad Thompson who judging by the look on his face didn’t like that shit at all. Johnny did however as fopr the first time since he got to the arena that night he smiled even chuckled a little.
Conrad: OW, what the PHUCK Johnny?
LA Johnny Stylez: DON’T YOU EVER STOP A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL FROM DOING HER MOST IMPORTANT PART OF HER PROFESSION WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Conrad: I want to know what word you are keeping and who you are keeping it to…Come on brother CHAT ME UP a little bit!
LA Johnny Stylez: Wait ok fine…But just real quick say that thing you say that ALWAYS PHUCKIN PISSES ME OFF!
Conrad: What?...Ohh you mean ROLL TI…
JOHNNY BACK HANDED HIM AGAIN…ONLY THIS TIME MUCH HARDER! So hard he fell out of his char, and once he hit the ground he motioned for the nurse to proceed which she did. And as the fluid traveled from the tubes and directly into his veins Johnny felt that amazing feeling that made literally every biut of pain he was feeling physically and emotionally fade away into nothing, as he could feel his eyes roll into the back of his head…and then there was
…DARKNESS!
Until suddenly my eyes opened, only I wasn’t at the hospital no more. As a matter of fact I felt the same way Dorthy’s BITCH ASS did when she woke up in OZ…Only in my particular case OZ happens to be what used to be ORLEANS PARISH JUVENILE DETENTION CENTER, until it burned down mysteriously the day I was released! I mean it’s just like I remember it, those ugly ass faded yellow walls, the rusty shit brown gates, the fat stupid cocksucking deputies who got their jolly’s pushing their douche bag cop authority on the mislead youth of the 504! And ah who could forget that fail yet still ever present rank smell of
And once I get my wits about me, I find out that as a matter of fact this was the last day I ever spent in this particular reformation facility…As a matter of fact this was almost six weeks to the day when I wrestled my first phucking wrestling match for Jesse’s Father and My adopted father Mr. James’s brother Jimmy’s wrestling promotion known as the HWA. They ran shows all over the UNITED STATES as one of the more popular indy wrestling promotions of it’s time. But yo not for nothing names like Stone Cold Steve Austin, Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Rob Van Dam, and Booker T all made a few appearences here and there! Remind me one day to tell yall about the time a seventeen year old DoN of Di$Re$PeCT gave the 5 time, 5 time, 5, time, 5 time WCW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION
But I digress, because I put my hand over my eyes when …uhh….I? Walk into my own plain of sight. I don’t know what kind of phucked up ass CHRISTMAS CAROL FREAKY FRIDAY BULLSHIT THIS IS, but if you ask me that Ebenezer Scrooge had it easy at least he had mother phuckers guiding him around his own past telling him what the phuck he was loking at…Me I would have even settled for the dark mother phucker who showed him where he was going to be buried in the near and clear future…Hopefully he aint here because he is not finished giving Jesse that particular tour just yet!
But either way the only thing I knew at this point was that I could see me being me, and I could feel the exact same things he…I mean I was feeling right then and right there…Don’t ask me how I know that shit either, because I don’t have a phuckin clue cept for the fact that I just know. But seriously yall shut the phuck up here comes the good part!
Suddenly we see the big door at the center of the room buzzes open as we see a rather short yet very large black woman with a rear end that looks like she has another person growing out of her back walk in with a clipboard and a bitchy attitude!
Correctional Officer Tanesha: JOHNNY…JOHNNY STYLEZ FRONT AND CENTER BOY TODAY IS YOUR LUCKY DAY!!!
Kaden: Yeah because he’s getting out before I had a chance to cut ya!
LA Johnny Stylez: Aw poor Kayden still mad Johnny knocked your two front teeth out on the basketball goal? I tried to tell ya I sucked at basketball, but you had to keep on bein a bitch…Don’t be bitter because you got what bitches get! And now as an added BONUS YOU GET TO SEE ME WALK THE PHUCK UP OUTTA HERE DIP SHIT! SEE YA NEVER FAGGOT!!!
Correctional Officer Tanesha: JOHNNY STYLEZ I SAID FRONT AND CENTER DON’T MAKE ME WASTE MY LUNCH BREAK MESSIN WIT YO BEHIN!
LA Johnny Stylez: You kiddin me Deputy Teesh?...You could stand to miss lunch…Maybe even skip dinner too shit!
Correctional Officer Tanesha: Ohhh boy that mouth of yours goin get you in some serious trouble one day! I’d be surprised if you aint back up in here before next Friday!
LA Johnny Stylez: Right and I won’t be surprised if you are watching me on TV in ten years on your lunch break that you should be skipping still up in this BITCHHH!
Correctional Officer Tanesha: I’d say we can make a bet on it, but you aint got no money!
LA Johnny Stylez: And you do?
Correctional Officer Tanesha: Hell yeah I just cashed my lil check! Me and my girls goin dancing tonight!
LA Johnny Stylez: Oh DEAR GOD I’ll bet that is just horrifying, you’ll be lookin like you got two tiny blackkids in a bear hug !
Correctional Officer Tanesha: BOY STOP IT WIT THAT FOOLISHNESS! You know you don’t gotta be an asshole all the time!
LA Johnny Stylez: Wait I was being an asshole? What did I say?
Correctional Officer Tanesha: MMMMhMMMMMM!
LA Johnny Stylez: No seriously Teesh, I’m gunna miss you because I promise you this is the last time you’re ever gunna see me, I start my pro wrestling career in exactly six weeks!
Correctional Officer Tanesha: Well baby I hope it work out for you, I really do, because even though you are the biggest and rudest smart ass I have ever known you sho don’t belong up in here! You really gunna miss me?
LA Johnny Stylez: Thank you…But no probably not even a little bit! But hey keep up the good work! And uhh, maybe go turn over Kaden’s bed because in addition to the shiv under his pillow he has an unhealthy amount of gay porn mags there too!
I give her a wink and one last arrogant smirk as we finally make our way back to central booking where I get put in another cell until the right documentation is filed and I am free to go. So I slide my clothes back on, which was a black and white striped pair of ADIDAS windpants and a black and white now t-shirt, and black and white pin striped HURLEY hat and a black thick rimmed pair of sunglasses OAKLEY’s actually. I felt around in underneath the third belt loop to see if the genius check in officer found it…And after feeling the small baggie I jammed in there before I got busted I was struck with a feeling of excitement and then soothing comfort knowing I didn’t even have to go anywhere to get stoned, because soon as I walk out this bitch Im getting this shit out of my pocket and putting this place far far behind me for good!
So as you see I was having a good phucking day, until they swung the last set of bars that stood between me and my freedom and instead of my Dad here to get me I found myself glaring at the most confusing person Ive ever known in my life, Jesse Styles’s father, my adopted Uncle James Styles. I say he was confusing because I still to this phucking day know whether I loved the man or hated the man. Being not actually ablood relative I think always kinda bothered him a little bit but he didn’t want to hurt Dad’s feelings so he never actually came out and said it…But that didn’t exactly stop him from saying anything else derogatory about me. Yet if it wasn’t for what happens next I honestly don’t know if Id even be standing here talkin about this shit getting ready for a match people all over the world have been drooling to see for almost two decades now!
I still remember the look on his face. He always gave me a smug look of sharp disapproval, always a “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU UP TO YA LITTLE BASTARD” kind of a look, which in heinsite I can’t really fault the guy (despite the fact that I SURE AS PHUCK DID) because nine times outta ten he was right! I was always up to no good. I was barley seventeen and I had a wrap sheet that was about as thick as one of R.L. Stine’s Goosebumps novels TRUE STORY! One more arrest and I was looking at my third strike before I could even legally buy a pack of phucking cigarettes! That and well the fact that My Dad wasn’t doing so well health wise, and if Uncle James was here that couldn’t have meant anything good I remember thinking to myself as a sharp piercing pain shoots through my gut as the mere thought of my Dad not being around to bail me out of all the messes I make sent a cold feeling up my bones, which fortunately didn’t last long as I walked up to Uncle James who just looked me up and down with disapproval as he rolled his eyes and said…
Uncle James: COME ON YA DUMMY THE CAR IS THIS WAY!
LA Johnny Stylez: Good to see you to Unc, where’s my Dad?
Uncle James: Ohh now he’s “your dad” huh he’s been trying to get you to call him that since he bailed you out of that dump he found you in nine years ago!
LA Johnny Stylez: Ummm….K, uhh is Jess with you at least? It’s a long drive back to Chi town and I don’t think your truck is big enough for two assholes to ride in there?
Uncle James: So walk, I don’t give a fuck your Dad told me to go get you out…How you get back to Chicago is your fuckin problem kiddo…Now I will offer you the front seat of my truck, but you pull any of your shit and bet your retarded ass I leave you right there on whatever street or highway we are on is that clear young man?
LA Johnny Stylez: Yeah, whatever?
Uncle James: Yeah whatever what?
LA Johnny Stylez: YEAH WHATEVER SIR!
Uncle James: That’s what I thought, now get in and do your best not to talk I don’t think I’m ready to listen to any of your bullshit yet! And well with your mouth the more practice you get not talking, trust me the better it will be for the rest of us! So in other words sit there, shut up, and don’t forget to put your seatbelt on!
…and just when I thought shit couldn’t get any worse…He cranks the engine, and suddenly the voice of Garth Brooks echoed from his bose speakers into my ears which then went straight into my blood stream causing it to boil and bring me to literally the brink of insanity! Because country music is just something I can’t…It drives me phucking
…and in all honesty makes me wanna break shit! The only thing that I could take any comfort in was that it would probably be another hour to hour and a half before the first signs of the fire I started in the laundry room this morning during my last shift is found. And by that time it just might be too late! Besides don’t phucking judge me I had over a ten hour drive ahead of me and with the only choices for radio is horrible country or stupid dick talk radio…So it was best to try and picture happy thoughts that I could close my eyes and go to in hopes that I would pass out and sleep through this shit road trip all together! But low and behold that aint how this trip went at phucking all!
Well it did at first, but the moment we drove through Baton Rouge and crossed over the Mississippi river bridge Jesse’s Dad turned down Calling Baton Rouge down and for the LOVE OF GAWD stopped singing and for the first time since Ive known him, and what turned out to be the only time ever..He actually stopped talking to me like I was a DUMB ASS CRIMINAL BLACK SHEEP WORLD CLASS PHUCK UP, and spoke to me well….It’s hard to explain see for yourselves!
Uncle James; Johnny wake up son I want to talk to you for a minute man!
LA Johnny Stylez: Come on man! Ive been out of jail for the better part of two hours can I just have five before you start in with all the Johnny You’re a DUMB ASS lectures? Please?
Uncle James: Boy I’ll make you promise the day you stop acting like a first rate Menace II Society, ungrateful fucking punk then I’ll stop talking to you like that! How does that sound?
LA Johnny Stylez: Yo uncle James you really need to cool it with all that man! I’m a grown ass man dawg! You don’t know shit about me! You don’t know what I been through, you don’t know where I come from, you don’t know what I’m capable of!
Uncle James: HAHAHAHAAH Shut the hell up you little wet behind the ears punk! Did I leave you in the can for too long, or hell maybe not long enough? I could turn around drop you off for a few hours and you can come out when you are officially a black person? I know enough about you to know you don’t talk like that! I really hate to sound like an old fart here, but what is it with you wigger kids these days huh? You see that’s your problem, hell Jesse has the same one. Both of you have hot tempers and very short fuses! But what is going to make the difference in a fire fight is the one who can use his brain against the ones who aren’t! Because maybe you should stop for one minute and consider the fact that you are only seventeen Johnny! And I know it feels like you know everything, hell I will even give you the fact that for your age with everything you have been through in your life I would be willing to bet my bottom damn dollar that you know than most seventeen year old boys your age! But even if that’s the case you still aint even close to knowing everything! I’ll tell you right here and right now boy here I am almost three timesd your age and I still don’t know everything! I know a hell of a lot more than you and Jesse combined but I still got things I learn every damn day!
LA Johnny Stylez: Well whoopty phuckin do, man! Good for you? How about we skip to the part where you get to the phuckin point?
James’s eyes fill with rage at the sentence spoken with a jagged sense of disrespect that James Styles NEVER…EVER allowed, and before I knew it that car was on the side of the road and he was out of his seat belt and his hand was around my neck and he slammed me against the passenger side of the window, I could see a firey passion in his eyes yet beneath it a sadness that I had never noticed before. And if we are just being real with one another, I was scared shitless. Not because I thought Uncle James was gunna toss me a beatin…Nah I aint never scared to take a beatin, I was scared because just from the way he was acting and the way he was talking to me, I could tell something was very very wrong and deep down even though I didn’t ask I already knew exactly what the phuck it was. So I decided for once in my life to cool it with the sarcasm and bullshit so that we both might arrive back to Chi ToWn
But unfortunately for me ontop of this physical demonstration of dominance it also came with a lecture! MOTHRER PHUCK!!!
James Styles: YOU JUST DON’T GET IT DO YA WISE ASS? IT’S ALL A FUCKING JOKE TO YOU AND JESSE AINT IT? WE HAVE BEEN RUNNING AROUND BUSTING OUR ASS TRYING TO PROVIDE FOR OUR FAMILIES WHILE LEAVING YOU BOTH SOMETHING IN THE PROCESS AND THE TWO OF YOU HAVE ALL THE GOT DAMN POTENTIAL IN THE WORLD TO TAKE WHAT WE HAVE STARTED AND REALLY MAKE SOMETHING OUT OF IT AND YOURSELVES IN THE PROCCESS! BUT NO! YOU TWO MORONS WANNA PLAY FUCKING GRAB ASS ALL DAY AND TAKE TURNS SEEING WHICH ONE OF YOU CAN DO THE DUMBEST THING POSSIBLE! I MEAN SOMETIMES I REALLY FUCKING WONDER HOW ANYONE CAN SAY CHRIS IS THE SPECIAL ONE WITH YOU TWO NUM SKULLS RUNNIN AROUND! YOU TWO DON’T FUCKING GET IT, AND ITS BECAUSE YOU DON’T WANT TO GET IT! AND I CAN’T SAY I BLAME YA! BUT SOONER OR LATER WHETHER YOU WANT TO OR NOT IT CATCHES UP WITH YA AND IF YOU AREN’T READY YOUR ENTIRE WORLD CAN TURN UPSIDE DOWN IN A MATTER OF MINUTES LIKE A TORNADO HIT AND EVERYTHING THAT WAS YOURS IS SCATTERED IN SHAMBLES ALL OVER THE STREET AND THERE WON’T BE SHIT YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT! SEE HOW FUNNY YOUR LITTLE SARCASTIC BULLSHIT IS THEN PUNK!
LA Johnny Stylez: Yo, UnK…slow down bruh what in the hell are you talking about man? GET WHAT? What is it you want us to get so bad?
I feel Jesse’s Dad grip around my throat lighten as the fire in his eyes just phuckin burns out…POOF JuSt LiKe THaT! A look of defeat washes over his face as he lets go of me and just turns around and puts his hands on the steering wheel and looks out his window trying to fight back what he quickly can no longer hide to be huge tears as I am witnessing literally the strongest man I have ever known other than my Dad have one of them
And as the tears roll down his rough cheeks, he looks up at the sky and starts to chuckle, as the knot in my stomach only grows tighter the longer we sit in this awkward silence on the side of the interstate in the middle of traffic. He reaches in the cup holder where I put my pack of Marlbro lights and he removes one from the pack and fumbles around looking for a lighter, as I reach into my pocket it and hand it to him with my mouth practically on the floorboard and my eyes wide open as I am just phucking floored by this entire situation. This man gave Jesse and I THE GOT DAMN BUSINESS when he caught us smoking, and I’m pretty sure Jesse would be phucking SoOoOoO PISSED if he knew his dad just took one of my joes and lit that bad boy up like he’s been smoking for years.
He sighs and takes a drag of his smoke and then plumps back into his seat. I see the smoke rise into the air from his nostrils and vanish into thin air as now he won’t even look at me? I almost work up enough courage to say something, but before I can utter a single word Uncle James begins to speak and says something to me that I swear on my life even if I contract ALZEIMERS while enduring the worst case of amnesia known to the human race, I won’t ever forget.
James Styles: Ya know Johnny, I’m going to be honest with you son, when Jimmy told me he was going to adopt you I was against it from the start! And Jimmy and I aren’t just brothers he is my best got damn friend in the world. There aint much he and I have ever disagreed upon…Until you came along, and between me and you it drove me fucking nuts for the longest! Because it seemed like the more I fought him on it, the surer it made him that he was doing the right thing. Somedays when I’m being a selfish ass I have myself almost convinced he just did it to piss me off, but I know why he did it…And maybe it’s time you do, because well Johnny he may not ever get the chance to tell you this himself! You see a long time ago before he adopted you your Dad was married to a woman that he loved more than anyone on this planent has ever loved anything in the entire world! I mean these two were perfect for each other. I can’t tell you where she came from or how he met her. I just know one day he went out to a movie and came back with her and they were together every day after that until she was at one of her friends birthday party had a little too much to drink and fell asleep behind the wheel on the way home.
The doctor promised Jimmy she didn’t suffer, which maybe spared your Father a little grief but it didn’t matter because from that moment on that man suffered enough for the both of them. I’m serious it was almost like he died in that got damn car wreck with her. You see she had one of them problems some women have where their lady parts don’t work the way they are supposed to and even though they tried non stop for the better part of a year and a half she couldn’t get pregnant. So they looked into other options, which naturally adoption was the best one for them. So they went and met with the adoption agency and were going to adopt two infant twins a boy and a girl, but two weeks before everything was supposed to become official the accident happened and everything fell through. Which as it turned out was actually for the best because for a long while there Jimmy forgot how to take care of himself, if he would have had them babies it would have been a got damn disaster I can promise you that much.
Then one day Jimmy woke up and told me that he had changed his mind, he didn’t say why, but I really believe something inside of him spoke to him and motivated him to get off his ass and start living his life. So he got up, cleaned himself up and went right back to the adoption agency to see if there was something they could work out. And that’s when he came across your particular case. Troubled boy who was abandoned in the French Quarter as an infant with a history of abuse and violence. Seven different foster familys in five years. Yet despite every single got damn red flag that made every parent looking to adopt in the United States over look your case he ignored and wouldn’t give up until they agreed to let him adopt you. Hell even the guy at the New Orleans adoption agency even tried to talk him out of it the day he came to get you.
But when we both asked him why not try and adopt an infant like he and Steph planned he said raising an infant is something a husband and wife do together. This way he could still accomplish what he and his wife wanted to but he got to skip all the bullshit that comes with newborn babies. And he said when he heard your story it just didn’t sit right that any child should have to endure some of the shit you did, and that someone just needed to teach you how to be a man before someone else taught you how to be a criminal! Guess the joke was on him though wasn’t it?
Johnny got damnit I know it’s hard hearin some of this crap hell it’s hard for me to tell you especially since our relationship isn’t exactly of the ideal sort! But I think you should know that that man decided to take you in when no one else would! That man loved you when no one else in the world did! That man believes in you when no one else does! And I’ll give credit where it’s due I’ve seen your training and I was there that time you and Jesse caught Ricky Metts and Samuel Kentrera getting off the bus after they jumped Jesse in the bathroom at school! You got some fight in you boy there aint no denying that one bit! And you’ve got charisma the kind you can’t teach to anyone! The minute you began your training to be a pro wrestler was the proudest and happiest I’ve seen my brother since the day he was married! Because he is convinced that you have the talent to be the one that is going to help our HWA make it’s way into the future!
And ya know I honestly don’t know if he is right or wrong where that is concerned, but the sad news is son it don’t look like Jimmy is going to be around long enough to see it for himself! And to make a bad situation worse it appears that Steve Austin, Rob Van Dam, Booker T, and Hunter Hearst Helmsley have all signed exclusive deals with Vince McMahon and exactly one year from yesterday will no longer be allowed to compete on any HWA shows or pay per views. And with Jimmy not being able to be there helping me anymore it’s hard for me to make the necessary moves to help keep everything going. It’s just too much got damn work for one man to do by himself, so I had to take your Dad’s shares and sell them to someone else so that we can at least keep the doors open and a roof over all of our heads!
LA Johnny Stylez: WHO?
James Styles: Who what?
LA Johnny Stylez: Who the phuck did you sell my Dad’s shares to?
Jimmy Styles: Damn that’s the worst part, I didn’t have a choice it was a sink or swim decision and as much as it killed me to do it, I sold to Sabre we signed the papers yesterday and it became official as of two o’clock this afternoon!
LA Johnny Stylez: AW YOU GOTTA BE PHUCKIN KIDDING ME UNCLE JAMES…SABRE? THAT DOOD IS A TOTAL PHUCKING
James Styles: Tell me something I don’t fucking know already JOHNNY! But we are losing all of our top stars, and well while you and Jesse are coming along better than expected neither of you have been inside the squared circle for your first official match yet! BELIEVE ME BOY, if there was anything that slightly resembled a better choice BELIEVE ME I WOULD HAVE DONE IT! But there wasn’t and now for better or for worse Sabre is not only the HWA World Champion, but he is co owner of our wrestling company! And I’m sorry the offer he made wasn’t much…I’m actually praying to God it will be enough to cover the hospital bills and funeral costs…
LA Johnny Stylez: What did Dad say about all of this?
Uncle James just stares blankly out of the window as he takes the last drag of my cigarette and flicks it out the window as I see two large tears roll down his cheeks as that said it better than any words that could have or would have fallen out of his mouth.
LA Johnny Stylez: You haven’t phuckin told him? ARE YOU PHUCKIN KIDDING ME?
James Styles: No I’M NOT, and YOU AINT GUNNA SAY SHIT EITHER JOHNNY!!!
LA Johnny Stylez: BULLSHIT! YOU BET YOUR ASS I AM! You’re not gunna sit here and preach to me about how he is the only one who ever loved me and then ask me to blatantly lie to his face before he dies? PHUCK YOU UNCLE JAMES!
Uncle James: Fine then, see that is exactly what I am talking about you little prick! Sure walk in there as soon as we get back, knowing any moment could literally be his last and you tell him something that will make him worry so got damn much his final moments on this Earth won’t be resting and trying to find peace, but the exact opposite! YOU said earlier you were ready to be a grown man, but you know your father will be incapable of letting you do that. Do you want his final moments to be spent worrying about how to take care of a “grown ass man?” There is a got damn difference in letting the man die with a little peace of mind, and wasting any and everything that man has ever given or taught you! Because I got a newsflash for you Johnny, that was strike two! One more major fuck up and they lock you up and in all likelihood THROW AWAY THE DAMN KEY! And then everything my brother spent the rest of his life building will be for NOTHING, and it will be all your fault! Now I know you are a selfish son of a bitch Johnny, but not even you are that cold!
LA Johnny Stylez: OK fine! I won’t say anything!
Uncle James: Good, thank you! You are doing the right thing! And look I know I am rough on you, hell I admit I am mean to you, a straight up asshole! And apart of me knows I shouldn’t be, but arrogance like yours makes me sick, and watching you make a mockery out of my brother’s generosity for these last few years has soured me on the idea of you! But here is your chance to turn it all around Johnny! Here is your chance to stop bitching and crying about the hand life dealt you, and to make something out of yourself from nothing! Because you play poker don’t you?
LA Johnny Stylez: You know I do! And so does that three hundred bucks I took you and all the refs for two Saturdays ago!
Uncle James: Well then you know you don’t have to have a royal flush to beat the guy on the otherside of the table. Sometimes you just have to make him think you do! So the world dealt you a shitty hand? You can either be a chump and show your hand and let the world take you for all you are worth, or you play it close to the chest and you take the world for every red cent that you can you hear me? Because look here is a piece of free advice…Running this kind of a business in the world we live in today aint guna be easy. Especially with the internet changing so much about everything, things are only going to get more complex down the line, and well other than Chris you are the closest thing Jess has had to a brother, and you two are going to need each other if you are going to survive this shit and be successful! Because failure for this family aiint an option Johnny! I taught Jesse everything I know and will continue until I am in the same spot your father is in now…But our time in this business is ending. We have done all we can do and now it’s time to turn it over to yall! Because the last thing Jimmy and I agreed upon was that if the HWA and you and Jess are going to make it in this cut throat business you are going to have to stick together at any and all cost. SO do me a favor Johnny, I’ve never asked much of you!
LA Johnny Stylez: Um did you forget you just asked me to lie to my Father on his Death Bed?
James Styles: No I asked you to grant him peace you are just being a dick! Now quit fucking around and listen to me, because this is probably the most important thing I will ever tell you!
LA Johnny Stylez: OK, ok FINE, but if you are finna tell me that the real reason you want me to catch Jesse’s back in your absence is because he came out and admitted to you he LOVES THE COCK, and you are afraid he will be strung up downtown the victim of some hate crime, then let me just tell ya I kinda saw this one comin!
James Styles: Just shut the hell up and listen to me will ya? Why do you have to always be such a SHIT?
LA Johnny Stylez: I dunno Unk, jury is still out on that one I believe so…?
James Styles: Johnny I need you to do me this one favor…You look me in the eye like a fucking man and you tell me that no matter what happens after today between you and any member of this family you make sure, do whatever it is you have to do however you have to do it to ensure the survival of this company and see to it that this family’s legacy always has a future! Jesse I’m afraid inherited my stubbornness and his mother’s temper which can make him a bit short sighted at times! But make no mistake about it when he is kept on task Jesse has potential to be one of the greatest leaders of his generation! But in the event that he or anything else gets in the way of our company’s future and prosperity you do what we Styles have done all of our lives, what you have done your whole life…And you fight Johnny! And you fight tooth and nail, with cold blood running through your veins like the devil himself possessed you! Because in this business there will come a time or two where that is going to be absolutely necessary. You make me this promise Johnny and as far as I and your father are concerned you always were, always am, and always will be one of us! Because if you do that you prove to me and your father that his efforts were not made in vein! You fight like one of us for our family’s honor and legacy and you earn the name that was given to you that will ultimately allow you at least the opportunity to become something more than you were ever meant to become if your birth parents would have had their way!
LA Johnny Stylez: OK…but before I agree what if his stubbornness doesn’t give or budge? What if it comes to blows between the two of us? What then? You want me to snap your baby boy’s neck?
James Styles: No dumb ass, I want you to climb in between the ropes and you fight it out like the men you were raised to be! And if you end up spilling a little blood in the process then you grab a towel you let it
!!!!SoaK!!!!
!!!!SoMe!!!
!!!!!UP!!!!!!
AND YOU KEEP GOING UNTIL ONE OF YOU HAS HAD ENOUGH!
LA Johnny Stylez: SOAK SOME UP HUH?...Ha I like that! OK Uncle James…I give you my word! Now don’t take this the wrong way, but for your sake I hope you aren’t still around when that day comes, because I know deep down it will get ugly quick fast and in a hurry, and you might not have the stomach for it at that point?
He doesn’t say anything. He just glares out the window, as he puts his foot on the break and puts the truck in drive as we continue on our long journey home trying to race back so I could see my father one last time as we learned when we were still about five hours out that his condition had worsened. My aunt June put the phone up to his ear so he could hear me tell him to hold the phuck on till I got there so I could say good bye. I told him I was comin home, and while I couldn’t promise I wouldn’t get in trouble anymore I promised him that I would finish my training and I would be a pro wrestler before the New Year was in. SO we drove like bats out of hell all the way back to Chicago. Uncle James took the back roads so we could avoid the rush hour traffic when we pulled into the city.
We barley spoke on our way back after we finished that particular conversation, but I know we learned a lot about each other that day, as I have to say hearing him accept me as part of the family was the first time I ever felt like I truly belonged anywhere, and even though every day I saw or spoke to him after that he was still a got damn asshole to me, still I knew it came from a place that was founded and funded by respect and passion for the shit that we love, and while the HWA didn’t really make it to the future as Jesse and his legal team worked it out so that Sabre acquired the company and all of it’s debts he was unaware of and as far as I know he is still taking regular uncomfortable gang rapings from the IRS over that matter, but not before I won the HWA World Heavyweight Championship twice on the way out the door!
When we finally made it to the hospital Uncle James drove up to the 4th floor of the parking garage, and I shot up and yanked the handle of the door open as I was prepared to run straight to where the room my father was in, but before I could lunge out of the old pickup truck I felt my Uncle James grab my arm as I turned with a jerk and we looked each other in the eye as he told me one more thing…
James Styles: You are one of us, and the first rule of family Johnny, especially this family is…Always know that no matter what I will always be there for you if you really need me, and being family that means no matter what I do love you…But that don’t mean I have to like you!
LA Johnny Stylez: Whatever Uncle James…spare me your lame ass quips and antidotes, I’ve got more important things to do then listen to the proverbs of some Budweiser sippin, small pond fishin, geezer like you! But seriously thank you Uncle James…And I am a man of my word…Jesse and I will see our family’s legacy into the future, and you have my word that if push ever comes to shove you won’t have to look down and wonder what I am fighting for! SO for what it’s worth old man…
!!!!SoaK!!!!!
!!!!SoMe!!!!
!!!!!!UP!!!!!
…SEE YA HOPEFULLY NEVER OLD MAN! LOVE YA!
And then I slammed the door to his truck right as he was yelling at me to not slam the door on his truck. I laughed to myself as I turned around and started back peddling as I extended my middle finger as he smiled and shot his right back at me…Then turned around when I got to the automatic doors that lead into the hospital. I took the elevator to the sixth floor where my father was being kept over night by his doctors. And as soon as the doors slowly opened I saw practically my entire family, Jesse included all standing together looking like someone detonated a tear gas grenade in the room. And once the doors were open and everyone turned and saw it was me their faces dropped once again disregarding the necessity for any word or grouping of them as I already knew before anyone told me or had the chance to tell me how sorry they were.
The knot in my stomach that I thought I had left on the BASIN bridge was back only it was tighter than it had ever been before in my life, as it was the most sincere worst pain I have to do this day ever felt. I went into his room and it was dark and quiet. I kept waiting for him to open his eyes at any moment and shit was going to go back to normal at any minute. But after ten minutes of sitting in awkward yet peaceful silence reality set in, and I felt tears rolling down my cheek as for the first time in my entire life I cried cried like a little bitch. I knelt beside him and took his hand and silently remade my promise I made to Uncle James and My Father that I was going to see this all the way through. I was going to become a professional wrestler, and I was going to make the world that tried to forget me regret it, I promised to stop at nothing until it was clear and unchallenged that LA Johnny Stylez was indeed the BEST IN THE WORLD, AND WOULD FIGHT ANY AND ALL COMERS TO MAKE SURE THEY WOULD BE THE ONES WHO COULD TESTIFY THE TRUTH THEMSELVES. I squeezed his cold hand and kissed his forehead and I left the room. As I was struck with the notion that even though my father had given me everything I have today such as a family that hates me, and a pro wrestling career that is
I looked around the room and spotted Jesse in the corner standing there with HWA’s two lawyers that were helping sort the details of the sale to Sabre, but as I got closer to Jesse I noticed some strange company he had been keeping since I had been gone. I saw this rather large man with one of those dark presences that you can just sense…He has a silver mask on his face and his eyes felt like tiny invisible knives stabbing you everytiime they were on you. And next to him was this little baboon of a human being bouncing around the room thrusting his pelvis at everyone wearing a weird little mask of his own, and other than the mask the only thing this little jungle bunny was wearing was a loin cloth that probably has never even been in the same room as a bar of soap. Jesse could see that social situations probably weren’t the best idea for me at this current point in time so before I could make their acquaintance he met me half way.
LA Johnny Stylez: What in the phuckin phuck is that shit? Is Marlyin Manson putting together his own version of the fricken Village people?
Jesse Styles: NO YOU DUMB ASS THAT IS HAZARD!!!
LA Johnny Stylez: What in the phuckin phuck is a Hazard?
Jesse Styles: Only one of the hottest acts on the indy scene right now…I just signed him and his manager Spaz to exclusive HWA contracts man! Look at him he is a monster…And get this he can do a moonsault!
LA Johnny Stylez: WOW A MOONSAULT?
Jesse Styles: Yeah…Wait, is that sarcasm I smell?
LA Johnny Stylez: Yeah that or the brown shit on tip of your nose…Please tell me you didn’t stick your nose anywhere near that loin cloth! YOU DID DIDN’T YOU YOU SHIT SUB MARINER YOU!!!
Jesse Styles: FUCK YOU JOHNNY, SORRY IF I COULDN’T COUNT ON YOU SEEING HOW IT IS YOU MISSED YOUR ORIGINALLY FIRST MATCH ON THE ACCOUNT OF YOUR INCARCERATION!!!
LA Johnny Stylez: Yeah well you can inform Tree Trunk and that half monkey half pixi stick that you said was his manager that they are more than welcome to come be apart of our family’s wrestling company, but if they ever get in my phuckin way I’ll phuck them up so bad their masks will need masks ya dig?
Jesse Styles: Ohh is that right?
LA Johnny Stylez: Truest story I ever told ya CUEBALL! But look man, it’s been a long day I am gunna head back to the apartment I need to clear my head.
Jesse Styles: OK, well take your time…But not too much man I’m going to need you going forward!
LA Johnny Stylez: OK nevermind…THAT’S A GOT DAMN
Scene then fades to Tuesday morning present day the time is 5:45 a.m. and the Sun is slowly crawling it’s way from the depths of the horizon to it’s rightful place to the center of the sky. I sit on the tailgate of my truck with my kindle tablet on my lap, an almost empty bottle of Johnny Walker black in one hand, a half smoked pack of cigarettes to my left, and a large Cuban style cigar blunt that is filled with some of the best sour diesel my hippy friends could find in Chicago.
As the camera pans around we notice we are sitting in a graveyard in front of two head stones that read the names Jimmy & James Styles. I let the stroll down memory lane continue for a moment as it has been way too long since I have stopped in for a visit. I let a single tear fall from the corner of my eye as the wind softly brushed through the hanging leaves of the trees and in a moment of silent clarity what needed to be done became more clear to me than anything else in my entire life ever had. So I turned around and reached for one of my handy shovels that I always have on hand for emergencies…Or lessons that I need to teach…This situation of course being a little bit of both. I wiped the tear from my eye and laughed to myself as I felt a warm feeling shoot through my body as I hopped off the truck and walked right next to my Uncle Jame’s grave and immediately began to dig…
Almost 2 Hours LaTeR…
Covered in dirt The DoN of DiSRe$PeCT is not seen on the camera as all we can see is the head stones and a massive hole that presumably goes six feet beneath the surface. Then suddenly we see Johnny’s shovel come flying from the hole and we see two fingerless gloves hands begin to pull themselves from the hole. Johnny uses his strength to pull himself all the way up as he plops down and lets his feet dangle over the fresh burial plot in the Styles family section of the cemetery has been dug. Johnny wipes the sweat from his forehead as he removes the cigarette from behind his ear and his 4:19 platinum zippo from his pocket and sparks it up. He takes a slow drag from the cigarette and exhales the smoke through his mouth and nostrils taking a moment to collect his thoughts as he then peers right into the camera and slowly begins to speak.
LA Johnny Stylez: Life is full of surprises aint it Jesse? For instance which are you more surprised by? Either
A. THAT IT TOOK ALMST TWENTY YEARS BEFORE WE STOOD ACROSS THE RING FROM EACH OTHER AS OPPONENTS
Or
B. That I JUST STRAIGHT UP HAVEN’T BURIED YOUR STUPID ASS HERE A LONG PHUCKIN TIME AGO!!!
Because from what I hear it seems your memory is a little foggy especially where current events are concerned! SO allow me to take this wonderful opportunity that we have while you are still above ground for me to once and for all set the
It’s easier to pay attention that way I have found! Because the one thing you have confused Jesse is the thing that has baffled me literally this entire little feud of ours! Please if nothing else, and you are sitting at home this very moment trying to desperately enjoy the few fleeting moments of your professional wrestling career and are looking for some good strong final words may I suggest you at least attempting to explain to me where in the phuck you get off calling me a
Hopefully you have enough sense to know that is actually a rhetorical question at this point, because as far as your answer for that question I don’t give a flying phuck if you have one hundred good answers fact of the matter is I could care less if it’s because your brain is still severely bleeding from those vicious chairshots I gave you two weeks ago or you like most people are so used to being able to call me that for no reason and have everyone else agree. Either way none of it…Not a single thing you can do or say can take away the simple inescapeable truth that you Jesse Styles are and always have been
And idiot who is going to have the breaks beaten off of him on New Edge Wrestling’s first pay per view in almost five years, my first in almost a decade! But getting back to what I was saying at the beginning there Jess, we both knew in the back of our minds that this day was going to come sooner or later for one reason or another! And at first I have to admit to you right now in front of God, BaBy JeSuS, and everyone with a functioning brain that understands what the phuck I’m saying that when you first pulled that little stunt after the IGNITE reunion show three weeks ago it really bummed me out bro! It really pained me to think that you were so pathetically foolish to think for even a split second that this was going to
Which is dirt incase you were having trouble keeping up given your recent head trauma! But ya know the more and more I have sat back and thought about everything that has happened since then and your reasons why you chose to do what you did, I have to admit those feelings of disappointment have begun to vanish and have given way to a sense of moral and professional
I mean how phuckin dumb can you be Jesse? Because it was you who picked the stipulation for our scheduled date with destiny…And of all the matches you have booked over the years, think of all the endless possibilities that you could have chosen for us to do battle and inflict pain and punishment on the other for years of pent up feelings and aggressions, you decide to go and pick the one that allows me to use my phuckin
!!!!WEAPON OF CHOICE!!!!
As if I needed you to make it easier on me! Because the other thing that my inevitable victory over your sorry ass at ASCENSION will prove other than the fact that right out of the gate each and every single member of the New Edge Wrestling roster as well as the ones on the outside looking in thinking of joining our elite promotion will see first hand for themselves where the real power in this promotion will lie, as they will see that my message of DEFIANCE towards your direction of the future of this company will be too strong for you to contest and therefore will more than likely be the only got damn thing
And once you have been put out to pasture where you phucking belong and your moronic, pathetic, sell out desires to model this promotion after the other promotions that infest the landscape of our business in this day and age is an insult to ME and anyone else that has ever spilled a drop of blood in the name of making New Edge Wrestling THE MEASURING STICK of GREATNESS IN THE BUSINESS OF PRO WRESTLING, will be put out of sight and out of mind where they belonged in the
Because one thing I hope to make crystal clear by the time Monday morning rolls around Jesse, is that while I would have definitely preferred you be at the helm of the ship as I and my chosen few fight through the waves of posers, pretenders, and wanna bes as we make our way back to our position above and beyond any and all other wrestling promotions until we stand alone once again as the unchecked, unchallenged, and UNPHUCKINGDISPUTED HOME OF THE ELITE! These half ass promotions with their shows running every two weeks, with their half ass talent who wouldn’t know original if it kicked them in their nuts, and on their best day would struggle with people who spent the majority of the New Edge Wrestling careers at the bottom of the phucking barrel…I’m LooKin AT YOU DANIEL DEVINE and JOSH COLE! Everything about today’s current product makes me sick to my stomach and the fact that you wanted ME and everyone else in this company to sink to their level and
Because we might make a few extra bucks? PHUCK THAT! Cream always rises to the top Jesse, New Edge is hotter now than it ever has been and we don’t have a major TV deal, because we no longer need such a thing to survive! We finally have the freedom to run our promotion the way we want without some jerk off who doesn’t know anything or respect what it is we do sitting there telling us what we could and couldn’t do! Which one by one they all found out they were just wasting their time because at the end of the day the members of the New Edge Wrestling roster always have and always will reject anything that limits us from being who and what we are, which incase you forgot BABY RUTH is a collection of the
Because getting back to the point I have been trying to, and will make CONCLUSIVELY THIS SUNDAY NIGHT LIVE ON PAY PER VIEW, is that while it is very regrettable that you have proven yourself unworthy to bask in the glory of NEW’s bright future the part you must be having the toughest time with is going to be when you are forced to realize that despite what you may believe or have even fooled others into believing is that NEW needs you in order to retake it’s stature and rightful place looking down on any and all other
Because the one thing I am coming to ASCENSION to prove above any and everything else is something else you and I have both known for a very long time, pretty much since my arrival to the kingdom known as New Edge…Hell it’s a fact even your own father recognized before there ever was a NEW. And that Jesse is a truth you are either going to choose to accept or do so to keep from having to suffer and endure the degree of violence and punishment I have every intention of inflicting upon you for thinking you could slam your foot into my chin while my back was turned and get away with it! Which I again must point out is the stupidest thing you could have done, not because of the knowledge you possessed of what my reaction was going to be and that it would lead us to our date with destiny Sunday Night. No it was the dumbest bitch move you have ever made in your entire wrestling career because at this point Jesse Styles there is one fricken FACT that not even you can deny about this company…No matter how badly you, any of the butt chumpz in the back, or the dumb ass fans sitting in the stands or watching live at home with their thumbs up their asses can deny the simple fact that if you want New Edge Wrestling to not only succeed but stand above any and all other as the STANDARD in PRO WRESTLING then there is one person and one person alone who can inspire, push, and cement our place there and guess what DOUCHE BAG
…AND THAT PERSON JESSE STYLES is none other than yourz truly! And unlike you Jesse these aren’t words I am just spewing out of my mouth because they are things people have always said about you! No what I am saying is a truth that I will force feed you Sunday Night as THE DEFIANCE ESTABLISHES DOMINANCE OVER NEW EDGE WRESTLING, as well as sets the record straight once and for all…That the DoN of Di$Re$PeCT is and always has been the greatest superstar to ever step foot in an NEW ring, and if anyone else is foolish enough to challenge us then we will have no problem
So get ready Jesse because you are right the sneak attacks, the insult swapping, and the opposing ideals all of it comes to a screeching hault this Sunday…As two men will walk into that arena driven to lead New Edge Wrestling into a glorious future but only one IDEAL, only one direction, and only one leader will survive! So spend what few fleeting moments you have left with your wife, making sure you apologize for not being as strong as she is…Make sure she doesn’t make the same mistake she made last week in over stepping into a world she has no chance of surviving in. Because while she may have pulled a fast one on me, once you are out of the picture SLOTH, the number of people that stand between her, me and my vengeance will slowly but surely begin to vanish quicker than
Either way the newest and greatest era of this company’s history begins this Suday, and it will be an act of DEFIANCE that sparked it all…And while some have been waiting almost twenty years to watch me climb in the ring and slap you PHUCKING STUPID…I will prove to the world why you have been avoiding it, because this time Jesse when I put you down I am going to put your stupid ass down for GOOD…But not before I once, twice, maybe three times just to drive the point home force you to
AS YOU JOIN THE LOOOONNNGGG LIST OF PEOPLE WHO KNOW FIRST HAND WHY LA JOHNNY STYLEZ IS WAS AND ALWAYS WILL BE THE MOST DANGEROUS AND GREATEST WRESTLER THE WORLD HAS EVER KNOWN!!!
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But don’t despair Jesse because I picked out a nice spot for you right here next to your old man so you both can sit together and watch as I keep my promise and do what you were too weak, stupid, and inferior to do without me! So if I were you Jess I would get on your knees, get on google and start googline any and every religion you can and start begging any and all gods that ever existed for some kind of mercy in the afterlife…because the crimes you have committed against me, against New Edge, and against pro wrestling as a whole deserves the type of punishment that gets no mercy…Only pain, suffering, humiliation, and then darkness and dirt are all that lie ahead in your future ASSHAT! And know Monday Morning I’ll be laughing my ass off knowing that you know just as well as I do that you have no one to blame but yourself DICKHEAD! See ya in the ring!!!
And with that Johnny takes his IPHONe out of his pocket and takes a picture of the hole he dug right next to Jesse’s father’s grave and then text’s it to his cousin with the words YOU MADE YOUR BED CUZ…NOW IT’S TIME YOU LAY IN IT!!! SOAK SOME UP!!! He hits send, as he lights up another cigarette while throwing his shovel in the bed of his truck, and walks over lifting the tailgate back into its normal position. He then walks around and opens the driverside door and puts his keys in the ignition and cranks the engine. As the truck’s loud engine roars into the early morning sky, the digital screen on Johnny’s dashboard inform him he has just recioeved a text message from Al Envy and his board of directors at BRAZZERS…Quaterly Meeting in VEGAS as well as SEXKoN which is one of the biggest pron conventions hosted by BRAZZERS annually for the last six years. Johnny then texts Al…Vegas huh? Yeah why the hell not I could use the time to clear my head before I put my cousin down for GOOD! Meet you down there and we’ll see what kind of trouble we can get into!!!...Johnny hits send, puts the truck in drive and speeds off rolling over a few headstones on the way out…Leaving Jesse with a sick knot in his stomach while the rest of you are left with the notion you are always left with after a Johnny Stylez promo…Which of course as always
…Its Been YoUR Plea$uRE!!!
!!!!P.H.U.C.K.E.D.!!!!
FoR A LaCK oF A BeTTeR TeRM!!!
That it’s too late to go back, and you’ve reached the point where toast can never be bread again! And eventhough you never meant for things to get so phucked up, the fact is they are and you can’t take a single word or thing you did back. So the only hope you have is the hopefully choose the right course of action and hope that one day you will reach a point where forgiveness is an option, but even that thought is the furthest thing away from a guarantee so really all you can do is try and not phuck it up even worse and learn to live in the new shit world you created for yourself? Soundz phuckin
???G.L.A.M.O.R.O.U.S.
DoNT IT? YEAH WELL THAT PRETTY MUCH SUMS UP MY ENTIRE EXISTENCE!!!
I know, I know one of the reason most of the people who despise me, and I mean really phucking despise me do so from a place of pure, unmistakable, sweet, and sexy
!!!!J.E.A.L.O.U.S.Y.!!!!!
CaUsE I DO WHAT I WANT, TAKE WHAT I WANT, LIVE HOW I WANT
..And its all because I am literally the ABSOLUTE BEST AT WHAT I DO, and also I just so happen to be
!!!!VERY….VERRRRYYYY MUCH AWARE OF IT!!!!
…AND I NEVER MISS AN OPPORTUNITY TO RUB YOUR STUPID F’N FACEZ IN IT!!!
And because of that I get paid ridiculous amounts of money, which only opens more doors for me and has allowed me to get away with way more than someone like me should ever be allowed to get away with! So yeah don’t think when I walk from behind that curtain every phucking night and hear the collective voices of a sold out crowd yelling every curse and obscenity in the book (and a few that aren’t) my way that I don’t know and appreciate why! And I won’t sit here and lie to any of you that right there is part of the reason I absolutely LOVE being
~$~ THE DoN of Di$Re$PeCT~$~
AKA THE GREATEST SUPERSTAR IN THE HISTORY OF NEW EDGE WRESTLING!!!
Former SeVeN TiME HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION OF THE WORLD! THE ONLY REAL BLACKOUT CHAMPION IN THE HISTORY OF NEW, 14 Pay Per View Main Events, and some of the most memorable moments this business has or will ever know! And that’s just in NEW, I could literally keep going (and part of me really phucking wantz to), but I just brought all of that up just now to make one phucking thing very
!!!!F’N CLEAR!!!
EVERY PHUCKIN ACCOLADE ON THAT LIST IS MINE BECAUSE I FOUGHT LIKE HELL FOR EVERY F’N BIT OF IT!
And while most of you faceless, irrelevant, probably inbred MORONZ who sit behind your computer screen and talk shit without the fear of getting your phucking face smashed for voicing your irrelevant opinion to the world about subjects and people you know
!!!!ABSOLUTLEY NOTHING ABOUT!!!!
SO PLEASE TODAY I SIMPLY ASK YOU SPARE US YOUR 2 CENTZ, AND INSTEAD MAYBE JUST
!!!!F’N PAY ATTENTION!!!!
AND JUST MAYBE YOU’LL COMPREHEND WHY YOUR TWO CENTZ IS ACTUALLY F’N WORTHLESS!!!
Because yes you tune in every week and you see the arrogant smirk and you hear the sharp jagged insults that cut my opponents so deep they become disoriented and foolish, which in turn makes them easy phucking PREY! Like almost to the phuckin point where it aint even FAIR! Like playing
!!!!HiDe & Go SeeK w/ PHUCKING BLIND KIDZ!!!!
NOT FAIR!!!
But you don’t actually know a phucking thing about me! You don’t know who I am or where I come from! Shit half of you morons probably don’t even know that Jesse and I aren’t even really blood related! And even for those of you that do know and have read my bio knowing I was adopted when I was eleven by Jesse’s Father’s Brother his name was Jimmy! Ha there’s a name I haven’t thought about in forever! But a name and a face I couldn’t get out of my head as the ambulance finally pulled up to the hospital after Ignite went off the air and I was on the receiving end of one of the most vicious and passionate beatings my cousin has ever dealt to anyone!
And yet despite the fact that I could feel myself slipping in and out of consciousness, I couldn’t stop thinking about my life, NEW, the match that is supposed to take place this weekend, and how we managed to let shit get so phucked up between us that we wound up here! And as the nurse stuck her needle into my skin stitching the gaping holes the chair shots Jesse gave me left on my dome part of it really phucking bothered me! Because we had pulled this kinda crap on each other on more than one occasion, but this time…Ha, this phucking time was
!!!!WAY F’N DIFFERENT!!!!
THIS TIME IT WAS PHUCKING WAR!!!
And as everyone knows there is only one thing war actually guarantees anyone who fights in them and that my friends is
!!!!C.A.S.U.A.L.T.I.E.S.!!!!
AND THE WAY WE ARE HEADED IT LOOKS LIKE THIS WAR WILL BE NO DIFFERENT!
And of all the times in the world why I had to phucking feel this way and think about this crap right now is phucking beyond me…It was actually kinda pissing me off, because all of thus…EVERY PHUCKING BIT OF IT IS COMPLETLEY THAT SHORT SIGHTED, TWO FACED, EYE BROWLESS, HEEYYYY YOU GUYS RETARDED ASSHAT
!!!!JESSE STYLES FAULT!!!!
BECAUSE REMEMBER DICKHEAD YOU HYPE KICKED ME IN THE FACE!!!!
He turned his back on me after I promised him to do what I have always done and that’s put his company on my back and bring it beyond any boundary or heights we had seen before. But he didn’t like that because this time I was set on doing it the hard way! THE RIGHT PHUCKING WAY! So where in the phucking phuck he gets off CALLING ME THE COWARD, ME THE PHUCKING BACKSTABBER, IS ABSOLUTLEY JUST
!!!!F’N BEYONNNNDDD ME!!!!
I KNOW HE WAS STUPID BEFORE I GAVE HIM TWO HORRENDOUS BEATDOWNS IN THE SAME NIGHT BUT
???JESUS H. CHRIST???
WHAT IN THE PHUCKIN PHUCK DID HE THINK I WAS GUNNA F’N DO WHEN HE HYPE KICKED ME ON THE FIRST SHOW BACK?
That has been the part that has baffled me literally this entire time! And I know for a fact that is how I wound up a bloody phucking mess with staples and stitches on at least three parts of my head and face! But like I said before why does this keep happening? Why do we always wind up back here some how? Because everytime we get into it the punches get harder, the insults more personal, and the wounds much deeper! I guess when I saw him over a month ago when he sprung me from Orleans Parish Prison to tell me that he was doing the one thing in the world I wanted more than anything, I just wanted it to be different! I wanted to keep my word! But right now JESUS I just want some phuckin OPIATES! NURSE BRING ME SOME PHUCKIN PAIN MEDS…WHATEVER YOU GOT THAT IS STRONGER THAN MORPHINE MY SHIT IS KILLING ME!!!
Conrad Thompson: Wait hold on a second PHUCKSTICK, keep your word what in the phuck are you talking about?
Just then the scene opens up and we see The Paragona of Americana finally in a hospital room still in his ring attire with dry blood crusting up on his face, his eye is black and he looks like a complete and total can of SMASHED ASS! Sitting in the room with him is none other than beloved professional wrestling podcaster Conrad Thompson who heard NEW was reopening and has been joining Johnny Stylez on the road listening to his stories and hearing about his career as they planned to release a docu-series, and there was even talk of a book at some point. But either way Conrad knew Johnny getrs a little truthful when he is full of opiates and well he didn’t have anything better to do…But right when the story was getting a little juicy he could see Johnny was still fading in and out…So the nurse came in with a syringe and walked right up to his IV and went to inject it before Conrad stopped her.
Conrad: Mam I know you are just doin your job, but if you could just wait literally five seconds he was just about to explain something very important…
!!!!SMACK!!!!!
Johnny hauled off and backhanded Conrad Thompson who judging by the look on his face didn’t like that shit at all. Johnny did however as fopr the first time since he got to the arena that night he smiled even chuckled a little.
Conrad: OW, what the PHUCK Johnny?
LA Johnny Stylez: DON’T YOU EVER STOP A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL FROM DOING HER MOST IMPORTANT PART OF HER PROFESSION WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Conrad: I want to know what word you are keeping and who you are keeping it to…Come on brother CHAT ME UP a little bit!
LA Johnny Stylez: Wait ok fine…But just real quick say that thing you say that ALWAYS PHUCKIN PISSES ME OFF!
Conrad: What?...Ohh you mean ROLL TI…
!!!!SMACK!!!!
JOHNNY BACK HANDED HIM AGAIN…ONLY THIS TIME MUCH HARDER! So hard he fell out of his char, and once he hit the ground he motioned for the nurse to proceed which she did. And as the fluid traveled from the tubes and directly into his veins Johnny felt that amazing feeling that made literally every biut of pain he was feeling physically and emotionally fade away into nothing, as he could feel his eyes roll into the back of his head…and then there was
…DARKNESS!
Until suddenly my eyes opened, only I wasn’t at the hospital no more. As a matter of fact I felt the same way Dorthy’s BITCH ASS did when she woke up in OZ…Only in my particular case OZ happens to be what used to be ORLEANS PARISH JUVENILE DETENTION CENTER, until it burned down mysteriously the day I was released! I mean it’s just like I remember it, those ugly ass faded yellow walls, the rusty shit brown gates, the fat stupid cocksucking deputies who got their jolly’s pushing their douche bag cop authority on the mislead youth of the 504! And ah who could forget that fail yet still ever present rank smell of
!!!!PiSS WITH A HINT OF HOPELESSNESS!!!!
SO LIKE CHRIS STYLES HOTEL ROOM!!!
And once I get my wits about me, I find out that as a matter of fact this was the last day I ever spent in this particular reformation facility…As a matter of fact this was almost six weeks to the day when I wrestled my first phucking wrestling match for Jesse’s Father and My adopted father Mr. James’s brother Jimmy’s wrestling promotion known as the HWA. They ran shows all over the UNITED STATES as one of the more popular indy wrestling promotions of it’s time. But yo not for nothing names like Stone Cold Steve Austin, Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Rob Van Dam, and Booker T all made a few appearences here and there! Remind me one day to tell yall about the time a seventeen year old DoN of Di$Re$PeCT gave the 5 time, 5 time, 5, time, 5 time WCW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION
!!!!THE MAH PHUCKIN Bu$iNe$$!!!!!
AKA THE BEATING OF HIS LIFE!!!
But I digress, because I put my hand over my eyes when …uhh….I? Walk into my own plain of sight. I don’t know what kind of phucked up ass CHRISTMAS CAROL FREAKY FRIDAY BULLSHIT THIS IS, but if you ask me that Ebenezer Scrooge had it easy at least he had mother phuckers guiding him around his own past telling him what the phuck he was loking at…Me I would have even settled for the dark mother phucker who showed him where he was going to be buried in the near and clear future…Hopefully he aint here because he is not finished giving Jesse that particular tour just yet!
But either way the only thing I knew at this point was that I could see me being me, and I could feel the exact same things he…I mean I was feeling right then and right there…Don’t ask me how I know that shit either, because I don’t have a phuckin clue cept for the fact that I just know. But seriously yall shut the phuck up here comes the good part!
Suddenly we see the big door at the center of the room buzzes open as we see a rather short yet very large black woman with a rear end that looks like she has another person growing out of her back walk in with a clipboard and a bitchy attitude!
Correctional Officer Tanesha: JOHNNY…JOHNNY STYLEZ FRONT AND CENTER BOY TODAY IS YOUR LUCKY DAY!!!
Kaden: Yeah because he’s getting out before I had a chance to cut ya!
LA Johnny Stylez: Aw poor Kayden still mad Johnny knocked your two front teeth out on the basketball goal? I tried to tell ya I sucked at basketball, but you had to keep on bein a bitch…Don’t be bitter because you got what bitches get! And now as an added BONUS YOU GET TO SEE ME WALK THE PHUCK UP OUTTA HERE DIP SHIT! SEE YA NEVER FAGGOT!!!
Correctional Officer Tanesha: JOHNNY STYLEZ I SAID FRONT AND CENTER DON’T MAKE ME WASTE MY LUNCH BREAK MESSIN WIT YO BEHIN!
LA Johnny Stylez: You kiddin me Deputy Teesh?...You could stand to miss lunch…Maybe even skip dinner too shit!
Correctional Officer Tanesha: Ohhh boy that mouth of yours goin get you in some serious trouble one day! I’d be surprised if you aint back up in here before next Friday!
LA Johnny Stylez: Right and I won’t be surprised if you are watching me on TV in ten years on your lunch break that you should be skipping still up in this BITCHHH!
Correctional Officer Tanesha: I’d say we can make a bet on it, but you aint got no money!
LA Johnny Stylez: And you do?
Correctional Officer Tanesha: Hell yeah I just cashed my lil check! Me and my girls goin dancing tonight!
LA Johnny Stylez: Oh DEAR GOD I’ll bet that is just horrifying, you’ll be lookin like you got two tiny blackkids in a bear hug !
Correctional Officer Tanesha: BOY STOP IT WIT THAT FOOLISHNESS! You know you don’t gotta be an asshole all the time!
LA Johnny Stylez: Wait I was being an asshole? What did I say?
Correctional Officer Tanesha: MMMMhMMMMMM!
LA Johnny Stylez: No seriously Teesh, I’m gunna miss you because I promise you this is the last time you’re ever gunna see me, I start my pro wrestling career in exactly six weeks!
Correctional Officer Tanesha: Well baby I hope it work out for you, I really do, because even though you are the biggest and rudest smart ass I have ever known you sho don’t belong up in here! You really gunna miss me?
LA Johnny Stylez: Thank you…But no probably not even a little bit! But hey keep up the good work! And uhh, maybe go turn over Kaden’s bed because in addition to the shiv under his pillow he has an unhealthy amount of gay porn mags there too!
I give her a wink and one last arrogant smirk as we finally make our way back to central booking where I get put in another cell until the right documentation is filed and I am free to go. So I slide my clothes back on, which was a black and white striped pair of ADIDAS windpants and a black and white now t-shirt, and black and white pin striped HURLEY hat and a black thick rimmed pair of sunglasses OAKLEY’s actually. I felt around in underneath the third belt loop to see if the genius check in officer found it…And after feeling the small baggie I jammed in there before I got busted I was struck with a feeling of excitement and then soothing comfort knowing I didn’t even have to go anywhere to get stoned, because soon as I walk out this bitch Im getting this shit out of my pocket and putting this place far far behind me for good!
So as you see I was having a good phucking day, until they swung the last set of bars that stood between me and my freedom and instead of my Dad here to get me I found myself glaring at the most confusing person Ive ever known in my life, Jesse Styles’s father, my adopted Uncle James Styles. I say he was confusing because I still to this phucking day know whether I loved the man or hated the man. Being not actually ablood relative I think always kinda bothered him a little bit but he didn’t want to hurt Dad’s feelings so he never actually came out and said it…But that didn’t exactly stop him from saying anything else derogatory about me. Yet if it wasn’t for what happens next I honestly don’t know if Id even be standing here talkin about this shit getting ready for a match people all over the world have been drooling to see for almost two decades now!
I still remember the look on his face. He always gave me a smug look of sharp disapproval, always a “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU UP TO YA LITTLE BASTARD” kind of a look, which in heinsite I can’t really fault the guy (despite the fact that I SURE AS PHUCK DID) because nine times outta ten he was right! I was always up to no good. I was barley seventeen and I had a wrap sheet that was about as thick as one of R.L. Stine’s Goosebumps novels TRUE STORY! One more arrest and I was looking at my third strike before I could even legally buy a pack of phucking cigarettes! That and well the fact that My Dad wasn’t doing so well health wise, and if Uncle James was here that couldn’t have meant anything good I remember thinking to myself as a sharp piercing pain shoots through my gut as the mere thought of my Dad not being around to bail me out of all the messes I make sent a cold feeling up my bones, which fortunately didn’t last long as I walked up to Uncle James who just looked me up and down with disapproval as he rolled his eyes and said…
Uncle James: COME ON YA DUMMY THE CAR IS THIS WAY!
LA Johnny Stylez: Good to see you to Unc, where’s my Dad?
Uncle James: Ohh now he’s “your dad” huh he’s been trying to get you to call him that since he bailed you out of that dump he found you in nine years ago!
LA Johnny Stylez: Ummm….K, uhh is Jess with you at least? It’s a long drive back to Chi town and I don’t think your truck is big enough for two assholes to ride in there?
Uncle James: So walk, I don’t give a fuck your Dad told me to go get you out…How you get back to Chicago is your fuckin problem kiddo…Now I will offer you the front seat of my truck, but you pull any of your shit and bet your retarded ass I leave you right there on whatever street or highway we are on is that clear young man?
LA Johnny Stylez: Yeah, whatever?
Uncle James: Yeah whatever what?
LA Johnny Stylez: YEAH WHATEVER SIR!
Uncle James: That’s what I thought, now get in and do your best not to talk I don’t think I’m ready to listen to any of your bullshit yet! And well with your mouth the more practice you get not talking, trust me the better it will be for the rest of us! So in other words sit there, shut up, and don’t forget to put your seatbelt on!
…and just when I thought shit couldn’t get any worse…He cranks the engine, and suddenly the voice of Garth Brooks echoed from his bose speakers into my ears which then went straight into my blood stream causing it to boil and bring me to literally the brink of insanity! Because country music is just something I can’t…It drives me phucking
!!!!BANANA SAMMICH!!!!
…and in all honesty makes me wanna break shit! The only thing that I could take any comfort in was that it would probably be another hour to hour and a half before the first signs of the fire I started in the laundry room this morning during my last shift is found. And by that time it just might be too late! Besides don’t phucking judge me I had over a ten hour drive ahead of me and with the only choices for radio is horrible country or stupid dick talk radio…So it was best to try and picture happy thoughts that I could close my eyes and go to in hopes that I would pass out and sleep through this shit road trip all together! But low and behold that aint how this trip went at phucking all!
Well it did at first, but the moment we drove through Baton Rouge and crossed over the Mississippi river bridge Jesse’s Dad turned down Calling Baton Rouge down and for the LOVE OF GAWD stopped singing and for the first time since Ive known him, and what turned out to be the only time ever..He actually stopped talking to me like I was a DUMB ASS CRIMINAL BLACK SHEEP WORLD CLASS PHUCK UP, and spoke to me well….It’s hard to explain see for yourselves!
Uncle James; Johnny wake up son I want to talk to you for a minute man!
LA Johnny Stylez: Come on man! Ive been out of jail for the better part of two hours can I just have five before you start in with all the Johnny You’re a DUMB ASS lectures? Please?
Uncle James: Boy I’ll make you promise the day you stop acting like a first rate Menace II Society, ungrateful fucking punk then I’ll stop talking to you like that! How does that sound?
LA Johnny Stylez: Yo uncle James you really need to cool it with all that man! I’m a grown ass man dawg! You don’t know shit about me! You don’t know what I been through, you don’t know where I come from, you don’t know what I’m capable of!
Uncle James: HAHAHAHAAH Shut the hell up you little wet behind the ears punk! Did I leave you in the can for too long, or hell maybe not long enough? I could turn around drop you off for a few hours and you can come out when you are officially a black person? I know enough about you to know you don’t talk like that! I really hate to sound like an old fart here, but what is it with you wigger kids these days huh? You see that’s your problem, hell Jesse has the same one. Both of you have hot tempers and very short fuses! But what is going to make the difference in a fire fight is the one who can use his brain against the ones who aren’t! Because maybe you should stop for one minute and consider the fact that you are only seventeen Johnny! And I know it feels like you know everything, hell I will even give you the fact that for your age with everything you have been through in your life I would be willing to bet my bottom damn dollar that you know than most seventeen year old boys your age! But even if that’s the case you still aint even close to knowing everything! I’ll tell you right here and right now boy here I am almost three timesd your age and I still don’t know everything! I know a hell of a lot more than you and Jesse combined but I still got things I learn every damn day!
LA Johnny Stylez: Well whoopty phuckin do, man! Good for you? How about we skip to the part where you get to the phuckin point?
James’s eyes fill with rage at the sentence spoken with a jagged sense of disrespect that James Styles NEVER…EVER allowed, and before I knew it that car was on the side of the road and he was out of his seat belt and his hand was around my neck and he slammed me against the passenger side of the window, I could see a firey passion in his eyes yet beneath it a sadness that I had never noticed before. And if we are just being real with one another, I was scared shitless. Not because I thought Uncle James was gunna toss me a beatin…Nah I aint never scared to take a beatin, I was scared because just from the way he was acting and the way he was talking to me, I could tell something was very very wrong and deep down even though I didn’t ask I already knew exactly what the phuck it was. So I decided for once in my life to cool it with the sarcasm and bullshit so that we both might arrive back to Chi ToWn
!!!!ALIVE!!!!
AND GOD WILLING IN ONE F’N PIECE!!!
But unfortunately for me ontop of this physical demonstration of dominance it also came with a lecture! MOTHRER PHUCK!!!
James Styles: YOU JUST DON’T GET IT DO YA WISE ASS? IT’S ALL A FUCKING JOKE TO YOU AND JESSE AINT IT? WE HAVE BEEN RUNNING AROUND BUSTING OUR ASS TRYING TO PROVIDE FOR OUR FAMILIES WHILE LEAVING YOU BOTH SOMETHING IN THE PROCESS AND THE TWO OF YOU HAVE ALL THE GOT DAMN POTENTIAL IN THE WORLD TO TAKE WHAT WE HAVE STARTED AND REALLY MAKE SOMETHING OUT OF IT AND YOURSELVES IN THE PROCCESS! BUT NO! YOU TWO MORONS WANNA PLAY FUCKING GRAB ASS ALL DAY AND TAKE TURNS SEEING WHICH ONE OF YOU CAN DO THE DUMBEST THING POSSIBLE! I MEAN SOMETIMES I REALLY FUCKING WONDER HOW ANYONE CAN SAY CHRIS IS THE SPECIAL ONE WITH YOU TWO NUM SKULLS RUNNIN AROUND! YOU TWO DON’T FUCKING GET IT, AND ITS BECAUSE YOU DON’T WANT TO GET IT! AND I CAN’T SAY I BLAME YA! BUT SOONER OR LATER WHETHER YOU WANT TO OR NOT IT CATCHES UP WITH YA AND IF YOU AREN’T READY YOUR ENTIRE WORLD CAN TURN UPSIDE DOWN IN A MATTER OF MINUTES LIKE A TORNADO HIT AND EVERYTHING THAT WAS YOURS IS SCATTERED IN SHAMBLES ALL OVER THE STREET AND THERE WON’T BE SHIT YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT! SEE HOW FUNNY YOUR LITTLE SARCASTIC BULLSHIT IS THEN PUNK!
LA Johnny Stylez: Yo, UnK…slow down bruh what in the hell are you talking about man? GET WHAT? What is it you want us to get so bad?
I feel Jesse’s Dad grip around my throat lighten as the fire in his eyes just phuckin burns out…POOF JuSt LiKe THaT! A look of defeat washes over his face as he lets go of me and just turns around and puts his hands on the steering wheel and looks out his window trying to fight back what he quickly can no longer hide to be huge tears as I am witnessing literally the strongest man I have ever known other than my Dad have one of them
!!!!BREAKDOWNZ!!!
[/div][/b]…NOT TO MENTION I’M PRETTY SURE I JUST PISSED MY PANTS A WEE BIT!
[/font]And as the tears roll down his rough cheeks, he looks up at the sky and starts to chuckle, as the knot in my stomach only grows tighter the longer we sit in this awkward silence on the side of the interstate in the middle of traffic. He reaches in the cup holder where I put my pack of Marlbro lights and he removes one from the pack and fumbles around looking for a lighter, as I reach into my pocket it and hand it to him with my mouth practically on the floorboard and my eyes wide open as I am just phucking floored by this entire situation. This man gave Jesse and I THE GOT DAMN BUSINESS when he caught us smoking, and I’m pretty sure Jesse would be phucking SoOoOoO PISSED if he knew his dad just took one of my joes and lit that bad boy up like he’s been smoking for years.
He sighs and takes a drag of his smoke and then plumps back into his seat. I see the smoke rise into the air from his nostrils and vanish into thin air as now he won’t even look at me? I almost work up enough courage to say something, but before I can utter a single word Uncle James begins to speak and says something to me that I swear on my life even if I contract ALZEIMERS while enduring the worst case of amnesia known to the human race, I won’t ever forget.
James Styles: Ya know Johnny, I’m going to be honest with you son, when Jimmy told me he was going to adopt you I was against it from the start! And Jimmy and I aren’t just brothers he is my best got damn friend in the world. There aint much he and I have ever disagreed upon…Until you came along, and between me and you it drove me fucking nuts for the longest! Because it seemed like the more I fought him on it, the surer it made him that he was doing the right thing. Somedays when I’m being a selfish ass I have myself almost convinced he just did it to piss me off, but I know why he did it…And maybe it’s time you do, because well Johnny he may not ever get the chance to tell you this himself! You see a long time ago before he adopted you your Dad was married to a woman that he loved more than anyone on this planent has ever loved anything in the entire world! I mean these two were perfect for each other. I can’t tell you where she came from or how he met her. I just know one day he went out to a movie and came back with her and they were together every day after that until she was at one of her friends birthday party had a little too much to drink and fell asleep behind the wheel on the way home.
The doctor promised Jimmy she didn’t suffer, which maybe spared your Father a little grief but it didn’t matter because from that moment on that man suffered enough for the both of them. I’m serious it was almost like he died in that got damn car wreck with her. You see she had one of them problems some women have where their lady parts don’t work the way they are supposed to and even though they tried non stop for the better part of a year and a half she couldn’t get pregnant. So they looked into other options, which naturally adoption was the best one for them. So they went and met with the adoption agency and were going to adopt two infant twins a boy and a girl, but two weeks before everything was supposed to become official the accident happened and everything fell through. Which as it turned out was actually for the best because for a long while there Jimmy forgot how to take care of himself, if he would have had them babies it would have been a got damn disaster I can promise you that much.
Then one day Jimmy woke up and told me that he had changed his mind, he didn’t say why, but I really believe something inside of him spoke to him and motivated him to get off his ass and start living his life. So he got up, cleaned himself up and went right back to the adoption agency to see if there was something they could work out. And that’s when he came across your particular case. Troubled boy who was abandoned in the French Quarter as an infant with a history of abuse and violence. Seven different foster familys in five years. Yet despite every single got damn red flag that made every parent looking to adopt in the United States over look your case he ignored and wouldn’t give up until they agreed to let him adopt you. Hell even the guy at the New Orleans adoption agency even tried to talk him out of it the day he came to get you.
But when we both asked him why not try and adopt an infant like he and Steph planned he said raising an infant is something a husband and wife do together. This way he could still accomplish what he and his wife wanted to but he got to skip all the bullshit that comes with newborn babies. And he said when he heard your story it just didn’t sit right that any child should have to endure some of the shit you did, and that someone just needed to teach you how to be a man before someone else taught you how to be a criminal! Guess the joke was on him though wasn’t it?
Johnny got damnit I know it’s hard hearin some of this crap hell it’s hard for me to tell you especially since our relationship isn’t exactly of the ideal sort! But I think you should know that that man decided to take you in when no one else would! That man loved you when no one else in the world did! That man believes in you when no one else does! And I’ll give credit where it’s due I’ve seen your training and I was there that time you and Jesse caught Ricky Metts and Samuel Kentrera getting off the bus after they jumped Jesse in the bathroom at school! You got some fight in you boy there aint no denying that one bit! And you’ve got charisma the kind you can’t teach to anyone! The minute you began your training to be a pro wrestler was the proudest and happiest I’ve seen my brother since the day he was married! Because he is convinced that you have the talent to be the one that is going to help our HWA make it’s way into the future!
And ya know I honestly don’t know if he is right or wrong where that is concerned, but the sad news is son it don’t look like Jimmy is going to be around long enough to see it for himself! And to make a bad situation worse it appears that Steve Austin, Rob Van Dam, Booker T, and Hunter Hearst Helmsley have all signed exclusive deals with Vince McMahon and exactly one year from yesterday will no longer be allowed to compete on any HWA shows or pay per views. And with Jimmy not being able to be there helping me anymore it’s hard for me to make the necessary moves to help keep everything going. It’s just too much got damn work for one man to do by himself, so I had to take your Dad’s shares and sell them to someone else so that we can at least keep the doors open and a roof over all of our heads!
LA Johnny Stylez: WHO?
James Styles: Who what?
LA Johnny Stylez: Who the phuck did you sell my Dad’s shares to?
Jimmy Styles: Damn that’s the worst part, I didn’t have a choice it was a sink or swim decision and as much as it killed me to do it, I sold to Sabre we signed the papers yesterday and it became official as of two o’clock this afternoon!
LA Johnny Stylez: AW YOU GOTTA BE PHUCKIN KIDDING ME UNCLE JAMES…SABRE? THAT DOOD IS A TOTAL PHUCKING
!!!!PHUCK MOOK!!!!
…AND COULDN’T REALLY DRAW EVEN IF HE WAS A F’N PENCIL!!!
James Styles: Tell me something I don’t fucking know already JOHNNY! But we are losing all of our top stars, and well while you and Jesse are coming along better than expected neither of you have been inside the squared circle for your first official match yet! BELIEVE ME BOY, if there was anything that slightly resembled a better choice BELIEVE ME I WOULD HAVE DONE IT! But there wasn’t and now for better or for worse Sabre is not only the HWA World Champion, but he is co owner of our wrestling company! And I’m sorry the offer he made wasn’t much…I’m actually praying to God it will be enough to cover the hospital bills and funeral costs…
LA Johnny Stylez: What did Dad say about all of this?
Uncle James just stares blankly out of the window as he takes the last drag of my cigarette and flicks it out the window as I see two large tears roll down his cheeks as that said it better than any words that could have or would have fallen out of his mouth.
LA Johnny Stylez: You haven’t phuckin told him? ARE YOU PHUCKIN KIDDING ME?
James Styles: No I’M NOT, and YOU AINT GUNNA SAY SHIT EITHER JOHNNY!!!
LA Johnny Stylez: BULLSHIT! YOU BET YOUR ASS I AM! You’re not gunna sit here and preach to me about how he is the only one who ever loved me and then ask me to blatantly lie to his face before he dies? PHUCK YOU UNCLE JAMES!
Uncle James: Fine then, see that is exactly what I am talking about you little prick! Sure walk in there as soon as we get back, knowing any moment could literally be his last and you tell him something that will make him worry so got damn much his final moments on this Earth won’t be resting and trying to find peace, but the exact opposite! YOU said earlier you were ready to be a grown man, but you know your father will be incapable of letting you do that. Do you want his final moments to be spent worrying about how to take care of a “grown ass man?” There is a got damn difference in letting the man die with a little peace of mind, and wasting any and everything that man has ever given or taught you! Because I got a newsflash for you Johnny, that was strike two! One more major fuck up and they lock you up and in all likelihood THROW AWAY THE DAMN KEY! And then everything my brother spent the rest of his life building will be for NOTHING, and it will be all your fault! Now I know you are a selfish son of a bitch Johnny, but not even you are that cold!
LA Johnny Stylez: OK fine! I won’t say anything!
Uncle James: Good, thank you! You are doing the right thing! And look I know I am rough on you, hell I admit I am mean to you, a straight up asshole! And apart of me knows I shouldn’t be, but arrogance like yours makes me sick, and watching you make a mockery out of my brother’s generosity for these last few years has soured me on the idea of you! But here is your chance to turn it all around Johnny! Here is your chance to stop bitching and crying about the hand life dealt you, and to make something out of yourself from nothing! Because you play poker don’t you?
LA Johnny Stylez: You know I do! And so does that three hundred bucks I took you and all the refs for two Saturdays ago!
Uncle James: Well then you know you don’t have to have a royal flush to beat the guy on the otherside of the table. Sometimes you just have to make him think you do! So the world dealt you a shitty hand? You can either be a chump and show your hand and let the world take you for all you are worth, or you play it close to the chest and you take the world for every red cent that you can you hear me? Because look here is a piece of free advice…Running this kind of a business in the world we live in today aint guna be easy. Especially with the internet changing so much about everything, things are only going to get more complex down the line, and well other than Chris you are the closest thing Jess has had to a brother, and you two are going to need each other if you are going to survive this shit and be successful! Because failure for this family aiint an option Johnny! I taught Jesse everything I know and will continue until I am in the same spot your father is in now…But our time in this business is ending. We have done all we can do and now it’s time to turn it over to yall! Because the last thing Jimmy and I agreed upon was that if the HWA and you and Jess are going to make it in this cut throat business you are going to have to stick together at any and all cost. SO do me a favor Johnny, I’ve never asked much of you!
LA Johnny Stylez: Um did you forget you just asked me to lie to my Father on his Death Bed?
James Styles: No I asked you to grant him peace you are just being a dick! Now quit fucking around and listen to me, because this is probably the most important thing I will ever tell you!
LA Johnny Stylez: OK, ok FINE, but if you are finna tell me that the real reason you want me to catch Jesse’s back in your absence is because he came out and admitted to you he LOVES THE COCK, and you are afraid he will be strung up downtown the victim of some hate crime, then let me just tell ya I kinda saw this one comin!
James Styles: Just shut the hell up and listen to me will ya? Why do you have to always be such a SHIT?
LA Johnny Stylez: I dunno Unk, jury is still out on that one I believe so…?
James Styles: Johnny I need you to do me this one favor…You look me in the eye like a fucking man and you tell me that no matter what happens after today between you and any member of this family you make sure, do whatever it is you have to do however you have to do it to ensure the survival of this company and see to it that this family’s legacy always has a future! Jesse I’m afraid inherited my stubbornness and his mother’s temper which can make him a bit short sighted at times! But make no mistake about it when he is kept on task Jesse has potential to be one of the greatest leaders of his generation! But in the event that he or anything else gets in the way of our company’s future and prosperity you do what we Styles have done all of our lives, what you have done your whole life…And you fight Johnny! And you fight tooth and nail, with cold blood running through your veins like the devil himself possessed you! Because in this business there will come a time or two where that is going to be absolutely necessary. You make me this promise Johnny and as far as I and your father are concerned you always were, always am, and always will be one of us! Because if you do that you prove to me and your father that his efforts were not made in vein! You fight like one of us for our family’s honor and legacy and you earn the name that was given to you that will ultimately allow you at least the opportunity to become something more than you were ever meant to become if your birth parents would have had their way!
LA Johnny Stylez: OK…but before I agree what if his stubbornness doesn’t give or budge? What if it comes to blows between the two of us? What then? You want me to snap your baby boy’s neck?
James Styles: No dumb ass, I want you to climb in between the ropes and you fight it out like the men you were raised to be! And if you end up spilling a little blood in the process then you grab a towel you let it
!!!!SoaK!!!!
!!!!SoMe!!!
!!!!!UP!!!!!!
AND YOU KEEP GOING UNTIL ONE OF YOU HAS HAD ENOUGH!
LA Johnny Stylez: SOAK SOME UP HUH?...Ha I like that! OK Uncle James…I give you my word! Now don’t take this the wrong way, but for your sake I hope you aren’t still around when that day comes, because I know deep down it will get ugly quick fast and in a hurry, and you might not have the stomach for it at that point?
He doesn’t say anything. He just glares out the window, as he puts his foot on the break and puts the truck in drive as we continue on our long journey home trying to race back so I could see my father one last time as we learned when we were still about five hours out that his condition had worsened. My aunt June put the phone up to his ear so he could hear me tell him to hold the phuck on till I got there so I could say good bye. I told him I was comin home, and while I couldn’t promise I wouldn’t get in trouble anymore I promised him that I would finish my training and I would be a pro wrestler before the New Year was in. SO we drove like bats out of hell all the way back to Chicago. Uncle James took the back roads so we could avoid the rush hour traffic when we pulled into the city.
We barley spoke on our way back after we finished that particular conversation, but I know we learned a lot about each other that day, as I have to say hearing him accept me as part of the family was the first time I ever felt like I truly belonged anywhere, and even though every day I saw or spoke to him after that he was still a got damn asshole to me, still I knew it came from a place that was founded and funded by respect and passion for the shit that we love, and while the HWA didn’t really make it to the future as Jesse and his legal team worked it out so that Sabre acquired the company and all of it’s debts he was unaware of and as far as I know he is still taking regular uncomfortable gang rapings from the IRS over that matter, but not before I won the HWA World Heavyweight Championship twice on the way out the door!
When we finally made it to the hospital Uncle James drove up to the 4th floor of the parking garage, and I shot up and yanked the handle of the door open as I was prepared to run straight to where the room my father was in, but before I could lunge out of the old pickup truck I felt my Uncle James grab my arm as I turned with a jerk and we looked each other in the eye as he told me one more thing…
James Styles: You are one of us, and the first rule of family Johnny, especially this family is…Always know that no matter what I will always be there for you if you really need me, and being family that means no matter what I do love you…But that don’t mean I have to like you!
LA Johnny Stylez: Whatever Uncle James…spare me your lame ass quips and antidotes, I’ve got more important things to do then listen to the proverbs of some Budweiser sippin, small pond fishin, geezer like you! But seriously thank you Uncle James…And I am a man of my word…Jesse and I will see our family’s legacy into the future, and you have my word that if push ever comes to shove you won’t have to look down and wonder what I am fighting for! SO for what it’s worth old man…
!!!!SoaK!!!!!
!!!!SoMe!!!!
!!!!!!UP!!!!!
…SEE YA HOPEFULLY NEVER OLD MAN! LOVE YA!
And then I slammed the door to his truck right as he was yelling at me to not slam the door on his truck. I laughed to myself as I turned around and started back peddling as I extended my middle finger as he smiled and shot his right back at me…Then turned around when I got to the automatic doors that lead into the hospital. I took the elevator to the sixth floor where my father was being kept over night by his doctors. And as soon as the doors slowly opened I saw practically my entire family, Jesse included all standing together looking like someone detonated a tear gas grenade in the room. And once the doors were open and everyone turned and saw it was me their faces dropped once again disregarding the necessity for any word or grouping of them as I already knew before anyone told me or had the chance to tell me how sorry they were.
The knot in my stomach that I thought I had left on the BASIN bridge was back only it was tighter than it had ever been before in my life, as it was the most sincere worst pain I have to do this day ever felt. I went into his room and it was dark and quiet. I kept waiting for him to open his eyes at any moment and shit was going to go back to normal at any minute. But after ten minutes of sitting in awkward yet peaceful silence reality set in, and I felt tears rolling down my cheek as for the first time in my entire life I cried cried like a little bitch. I knelt beside him and took his hand and silently remade my promise I made to Uncle James and My Father that I was going to see this all the way through. I was going to become a professional wrestler, and I was going to make the world that tried to forget me regret it, I promised to stop at nothing until it was clear and unchallenged that LA Johnny Stylez was indeed the BEST IN THE WORLD, AND WOULD FIGHT ANY AND ALL COMERS TO MAKE SURE THEY WOULD BE THE ONES WHO COULD TESTIFY THE TRUTH THEMSELVES. I squeezed his cold hand and kissed his forehead and I left the room. As I was struck with the notion that even though my father had given me everything I have today such as a family that hates me, and a pro wrestling career that is
!!!!!2nd TO ABSOLUTLEY N.O.N.E.!!!!!
FROM DAMON RIGGS TO RYAN PUGH I AM STILL PHUCKIN
~$~ #BeTTeRTHaNU ~$~
…AND I DON’T EVEN NEED a cRu TO PROVE THAT SHIT!!!!
I looked around the room and spotted Jesse in the corner standing there with HWA’s two lawyers that were helping sort the details of the sale to Sabre, but as I got closer to Jesse I noticed some strange company he had been keeping since I had been gone. I saw this rather large man with one of those dark presences that you can just sense…He has a silver mask on his face and his eyes felt like tiny invisible knives stabbing you everytiime they were on you. And next to him was this little baboon of a human being bouncing around the room thrusting his pelvis at everyone wearing a weird little mask of his own, and other than the mask the only thing this little jungle bunny was wearing was a loin cloth that probably has never even been in the same room as a bar of soap. Jesse could see that social situations probably weren’t the best idea for me at this current point in time so before I could make their acquaintance he met me half way.
LA Johnny Stylez: What in the phuckin phuck is that shit? Is Marlyin Manson putting together his own version of the fricken Village people?
Jesse Styles: NO YOU DUMB ASS THAT IS HAZARD!!!
LA Johnny Stylez: What in the phuckin phuck is a Hazard?
Jesse Styles: Only one of the hottest acts on the indy scene right now…I just signed him and his manager Spaz to exclusive HWA contracts man! Look at him he is a monster…And get this he can do a moonsault!
LA Johnny Stylez: WOW A MOONSAULT?
Jesse Styles: Yeah…Wait, is that sarcasm I smell?
LA Johnny Stylez: Yeah that or the brown shit on tip of your nose…Please tell me you didn’t stick your nose anywhere near that loin cloth! YOU DID DIDN’T YOU YOU SHIT SUB MARINER YOU!!!
Jesse Styles: FUCK YOU JOHNNY, SORRY IF I COULDN’T COUNT ON YOU SEEING HOW IT IS YOU MISSED YOUR ORIGINALLY FIRST MATCH ON THE ACCOUNT OF YOUR INCARCERATION!!!
LA Johnny Stylez: Yeah well you can inform Tree Trunk and that half monkey half pixi stick that you said was his manager that they are more than welcome to come be apart of our family’s wrestling company, but if they ever get in my phuckin way I’ll phuck them up so bad their masks will need masks ya dig?
Jesse Styles: Ohh is that right?
LA Johnny Stylez: Truest story I ever told ya CUEBALL! But look man, it’s been a long day I am gunna head back to the apartment I need to clear my head.
Jesse Styles: OK, well take your time…But not too much man I’m going to need you going forward!
LA Johnny Stylez: OK nevermind…THAT’S A GOT DAMN
!!!TRuE SToRy!!!!
…AND DON’T YOU EVER FORGET IT CUEBALL!
Scene then fades to Tuesday morning present day the time is 5:45 a.m. and the Sun is slowly crawling it’s way from the depths of the horizon to it’s rightful place to the center of the sky. I sit on the tailgate of my truck with my kindle tablet on my lap, an almost empty bottle of Johnny Walker black in one hand, a half smoked pack of cigarettes to my left, and a large Cuban style cigar blunt that is filled with some of the best sour diesel my hippy friends could find in Chicago.
As the camera pans around we notice we are sitting in a graveyard in front of two head stones that read the names Jimmy & James Styles. I let the stroll down memory lane continue for a moment as it has been way too long since I have stopped in for a visit. I let a single tear fall from the corner of my eye as the wind softly brushed through the hanging leaves of the trees and in a moment of silent clarity what needed to be done became more clear to me than anything else in my entire life ever had. So I turned around and reached for one of my handy shovels that I always have on hand for emergencies…Or lessons that I need to teach…This situation of course being a little bit of both. I wiped the tear from my eye and laughed to myself as I felt a warm feeling shoot through my body as I hopped off the truck and walked right next to my Uncle Jame’s grave and immediately began to dig…
Almost 2 Hours LaTeR…
Covered in dirt The DoN of DiSRe$PeCT is not seen on the camera as all we can see is the head stones and a massive hole that presumably goes six feet beneath the surface. Then suddenly we see Johnny’s shovel come flying from the hole and we see two fingerless gloves hands begin to pull themselves from the hole. Johnny uses his strength to pull himself all the way up as he plops down and lets his feet dangle over the fresh burial plot in the Styles family section of the cemetery has been dug. Johnny wipes the sweat from his forehead as he removes the cigarette from behind his ear and his 4:19 platinum zippo from his pocket and sparks it up. He takes a slow drag from the cigarette and exhales the smoke through his mouth and nostrils taking a moment to collect his thoughts as he then peers right into the camera and slowly begins to speak.
LA Johnny Stylez: Life is full of surprises aint it Jesse? For instance which are you more surprised by? Either
A. THAT IT TOOK ALMST TWENTY YEARS BEFORE WE STOOD ACROSS THE RING FROM EACH OTHER AS OPPONENTS
Or
B. That I JUST STRAIGHT UP HAVEN’T BURIED YOUR STUPID ASS HERE A LONG PHUCKIN TIME AGO!!!
Because from what I hear it seems your memory is a little foggy especially where current events are concerned! SO allow me to take this wonderful opportunity that we have while you are still above ground for me to once and for all set the
!!!!F’N ReCoRD STRaIGHT!!!!
MAYBE TRY REMOVING YOUR HEAD FROM YOUR ASS THIS TIME!!!
It’s easier to pay attention that way I have found! Because the one thing you have confused Jesse is the thing that has baffled me literally this entire little feud of ours! Please if nothing else, and you are sitting at home this very moment trying to desperately enjoy the few fleeting moments of your professional wrestling career and are looking for some good strong final words may I suggest you at least attempting to explain to me where in the phuck you get off calling me a
?F’N BACKSTABBER AND A COWARD?
WHEN IT WAS YOU WHO HYPE KICKED ME WHILE MY BACK WAS TURNED AFTER OUR TAG TEAM MATCH???
Hopefully you have enough sense to know that is actually a rhetorical question at this point, because as far as your answer for that question I don’t give a flying phuck if you have one hundred good answers fact of the matter is I could care less if it’s because your brain is still severely bleeding from those vicious chairshots I gave you two weeks ago or you like most people are so used to being able to call me that for no reason and have everyone else agree. Either way none of it…Not a single thing you can do or say can take away the simple inescapeable truth that you Jesse Styles are and always have been
!!!!EVERF’NTHING YOU ACCUSED ME OF BEING!!!!
BUT NOW YOU’VE PROVEN THAT YOU ARE ALSO A F’N IDIOT ON TOP OF IT ALL!!!
And idiot who is going to have the breaks beaten off of him on New Edge Wrestling’s first pay per view in almost five years, my first in almost a decade! But getting back to what I was saying at the beginning there Jess, we both knew in the back of our minds that this day was going to come sooner or later for one reason or another! And at first I have to admit to you right now in front of God, BaBy JeSuS, and everyone with a functioning brain that understands what the phuck I’m saying that when you first pulled that little stunt after the IGNITE reunion show three weeks ago it really bummed me out bro! It really pained me to think that you were so pathetically foolish to think for even a split second that this was going to
!!!!E.N.D.!!!!!
ANY OTHER WAY THAN ME BEATING YOUR BITCH ASS AND THEN BURYING YOUR SORRY ASS
!!!!A.L.I.V.E.!!!!
UNDERNEATH THE SUBSTANCE ON THIS PLANET THAT RESEMBLES YOU THE MOST!
Which is dirt incase you were having trouble keeping up given your recent head trauma! But ya know the more and more I have sat back and thought about everything that has happened since then and your reasons why you chose to do what you did, I have to admit those feelings of disappointment have begun to vanish and have given way to a sense of moral and professional
!!!!S.A.T.I.S.F.A.C.T.I.O.N.!!!!!
KNOWING THE WORLD WILL BE WATCHING AS MY DEFIANCE BREAX AND BURIES YOUR STUPID ASS ONCE AND FOR ALL!!!
I mean how phuckin dumb can you be Jesse? Because it was you who picked the stipulation for our scheduled date with destiny…And of all the matches you have booked over the years, think of all the endless possibilities that you could have chosen for us to do battle and inflict pain and punishment on the other for years of pent up feelings and aggressions, you decide to go and pick the one that allows me to use my phuckin
!!!!WEAPON OF CHOICE!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAA WHAT ARE YOU F’N RETARDED???
As if I needed you to make it easier on me! Because the other thing that my inevitable victory over your sorry ass at ASCENSION will prove other than the fact that right out of the gate each and every single member of the New Edge Wrestling roster as well as the ones on the outside looking in thinking of joining our elite promotion will see first hand for themselves where the real power in this promotion will lie, as they will see that my message of DEFIANCE towards your direction of the future of this company will be too strong for you to contest and therefore will more than likely be the only got damn thing
!!!!YOU’LL BE BURIED WITH!!!!
BeCauSE BY THE TiMe tHE DiRT STaRTS GeTTING DuMPED ON YoU YoUR
!!!!DiGNiTy!!!!
WiLL HaVe BeeN LoNG PhuCKIN GoNe BY THaT POINT ASSHOLE!!!
And once you have been put out to pasture where you phucking belong and your moronic, pathetic, sell out desires to model this promotion after the other promotions that infest the landscape of our business in this day and age is an insult to ME and anyone else that has ever spilled a drop of blood in the name of making New Edge Wrestling THE MEASURING STICK of GREATNESS IN THE BUSINESS OF PRO WRESTLING, will be put out of sight and out of mind where they belonged in the
!!!!F’N FiRST PLACE!!!!
AND THEN WE CAN FINALLY BEGIN OUR JOURNEY BACK TO THE TOP!!!
Because one thing I hope to make crystal clear by the time Monday morning rolls around Jesse, is that while I would have definitely preferred you be at the helm of the ship as I and my chosen few fight through the waves of posers, pretenders, and wanna bes as we make our way back to our position above and beyond any and all other wrestling promotions until we stand alone once again as the unchecked, unchallenged, and UNPHUCKINGDISPUTED HOME OF THE ELITE! These half ass promotions with their shows running every two weeks, with their half ass talent who wouldn’t know original if it kicked them in their nuts, and on their best day would struggle with people who spent the majority of the New Edge Wrestling careers at the bottom of the phucking barrel…I’m LooKin AT YOU DANIEL DEVINE and JOSH COLE! Everything about today’s current product makes me sick to my stomach and the fact that you wanted ME and everyone else in this company to sink to their level and
???CONFORM???
WHY IN THE PHUCK SHOULD WE EVER DO A STUPID THING LIKE THAT?
Because we might make a few extra bucks? PHUCK THAT! Cream always rises to the top Jesse, New Edge is hotter now than it ever has been and we don’t have a major TV deal, because we no longer need such a thing to survive! We finally have the freedom to run our promotion the way we want without some jerk off who doesn’t know anything or respect what it is we do sitting there telling us what we could and couldn’t do! Which one by one they all found out they were just wasting their time because at the end of the day the members of the New Edge Wrestling roster always have and always will reject anything that limits us from being who and what we are, which incase you forgot BABY RUTH is a collection of the
~$~GREATEST TALENT TO EVER LACE UP A PAIR OF BOOTZ~$~
…AND YOU HAVE DEMONSTRATED YOU ARE NO LONGER FIT TO LEAD US!!!!
Because getting back to the point I have been trying to, and will make CONCLUSIVELY THIS SUNDAY NIGHT LIVE ON PAY PER VIEW, is that while it is very regrettable that you have proven yourself unworthy to bask in the glory of NEW’s bright future the part you must be having the toughest time with is going to be when you are forced to realize that despite what you may believe or have even fooled others into believing is that NEW needs you in order to retake it’s stature and rightful place looking down on any and all other
!!!!JoBBER FACTORIES!!!!
THAT HILARIOUSLY CALL THEMSELVES PRO WRESTLING COMPANIES!!!
Because the one thing I am coming to ASCENSION to prove above any and everything else is something else you and I have both known for a very long time, pretty much since my arrival to the kingdom known as New Edge…Hell it’s a fact even your own father recognized before there ever was a NEW. And that Jesse is a truth you are either going to choose to accept or do so to keep from having to suffer and endure the degree of violence and punishment I have every intention of inflicting upon you for thinking you could slam your foot into my chin while my back was turned and get away with it! Which I again must point out is the stupidest thing you could have done, not because of the knowledge you possessed of what my reaction was going to be and that it would lead us to our date with destiny Sunday Night. No it was the dumbest bitch move you have ever made in your entire wrestling career because at this point Jesse Styles there is one fricken FACT that not even you can deny about this company…No matter how badly you, any of the butt chumpz in the back, or the dumb ass fans sitting in the stands or watching live at home with their thumbs up their asses can deny the simple fact that if you want New Edge Wrestling to not only succeed but stand above any and all other as the STANDARD in PRO WRESTLING then there is one person and one person alone who can inspire, push, and cement our place there and guess what DOUCHE BAG
!!!!!IT SURE AS PHUCK AINT YOU!!!!!
NO THE TRUTH IS NEW EDGE WRESTLING REALLY ONLY NEEDS ONE PERSON TO ENSURE GREATNESS
…AND THAT PERSON JESSE STYLES is none other than yourz truly! And unlike you Jesse these aren’t words I am just spewing out of my mouth because they are things people have always said about you! No what I am saying is a truth that I will force feed you Sunday Night as THE DEFIANCE ESTABLISHES DOMINANCE OVER NEW EDGE WRESTLING, as well as sets the record straight once and for all…That the DoN of Di$Re$PeCT is and always has been the greatest superstar to ever step foot in an NEW ring, and if anyone else is foolish enough to challenge us then we will have no problem
!!!!BEATING AND BURYING THEM!!!!
RIGHT NEXT TO YOUR STUPID ASS!!!!
So get ready Jesse because you are right the sneak attacks, the insult swapping, and the opposing ideals all of it comes to a screeching hault this Sunday…As two men will walk into that arena driven to lead New Edge Wrestling into a glorious future but only one IDEAL, only one direction, and only one leader will survive! So spend what few fleeting moments you have left with your wife, making sure you apologize for not being as strong as she is…Make sure she doesn’t make the same mistake she made last week in over stepping into a world she has no chance of surviving in. Because while she may have pulled a fast one on me, once you are out of the picture SLOTH, the number of people that stand between her, me and my vengeance will slowly but surely begin to vanish quicker than
!!!!SeNSE IN A NOCTURNAL PROMO!!!!
OR PeOPLE WHO RECALL WHAT TOILET BOWL DAMON RIGGS USED TO BE CHAMPION OF!
Either way the newest and greatest era of this company’s history begins this Suday, and it will be an act of DEFIANCE that sparked it all…And while some have been waiting almost twenty years to watch me climb in the ring and slap you PHUCKING STUPID…I will prove to the world why you have been avoiding it, because this time Jesse when I put you down I am going to put your stupid ass down for GOOD…But not before I once, twice, maybe three times just to drive the point home force you to
!!!!SoaK!!!!
!!!SoMe!!!!
!!!!!UP!!!!!
!!!SoMe!!!!
!!!!!UP!!!!!
AS YOU JOIN THE LOOOONNNGGG LIST OF PEOPLE WHO KNOW FIRST HAND WHY LA JOHNNY STYLEZ IS WAS AND ALWAYS WILL BE THE MOST DANGEROUS AND GREATEST WRESTLER THE WORLD HAS EVER KNOWN!!!
[/i][/b]
But don’t despair Jesse because I picked out a nice spot for you right here next to your old man so you both can sit together and watch as I keep my promise and do what you were too weak, stupid, and inferior to do without me! So if I were you Jess I would get on your knees, get on google and start googline any and every religion you can and start begging any and all gods that ever existed for some kind of mercy in the afterlife…because the crimes you have committed against me, against New Edge, and against pro wrestling as a whole deserves the type of punishment that gets no mercy…Only pain, suffering, humiliation, and then darkness and dirt are all that lie ahead in your future ASSHAT! And know Monday Morning I’ll be laughing my ass off knowing that you know just as well as I do that you have no one to blame but yourself DICKHEAD! See ya in the ring!!!
And with that Johnny takes his IPHONe out of his pocket and takes a picture of the hole he dug right next to Jesse’s father’s grave and then text’s it to his cousin with the words YOU MADE YOUR BED CUZ…NOW IT’S TIME YOU LAY IN IT!!! SOAK SOME UP!!! He hits send, as he lights up another cigarette while throwing his shovel in the bed of his truck, and walks over lifting the tailgate back into its normal position. He then walks around and opens the driverside door and puts his keys in the ignition and cranks the engine. As the truck’s loud engine roars into the early morning sky, the digital screen on Johnny’s dashboard inform him he has just recioeved a text message from Al Envy and his board of directors at BRAZZERS…Quaterly Meeting in VEGAS as well as SEXKoN which is one of the biggest pron conventions hosted by BRAZZERS annually for the last six years. Johnny then texts Al…Vegas huh? Yeah why the hell not I could use the time to clear my head before I put my cousin down for GOOD! Meet you down there and we’ll see what kind of trouble we can get into!!!...Johnny hits send, puts the truck in drive and speeds off rolling over a few headstones on the way out…Leaving Jesse with a sick knot in his stomach while the rest of you are left with the notion you are always left with after a Johnny Stylez promo…Which of course as always
…Its Been YoUR Plea$uRE!!!
4:19
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