Post by Roger Wright on Sept 12, 2019 0:19:26 GMT -6
At the edge of the playground squatted Roger, watching as Marie came sliding down the slide. She threw her hands up with excitement and let out the only type of scream a five year old could when excited as she ran to Roger, wrapping her arms around him, he returning the hug. “Did you see that Daddy? Did ya?”
“I saw you climb all the way up on your own, then slide down on your own. Good job Peanut, I’m proud of you!” Roger tasseled her hair, grabbed her hand, and the two walked over to a picnic table that had some water bottles, on it, and a lunch bag. They took a seat and Roger pulled out the Ham sandwiches that Anicka had prepared for them, he put one in front of Marie, and one in front of himself. They both dug in.
“I like Anicka.” Marie said, mouthful of sandwich.
Roger finished chewing and swallowed. “Don’t talk with your mouthful Peanut. And I do too.” Roger replied.
“She’s way better than Blair daddy, don’t you think?” This time Marie spoke before taking a bite of her sandwich.
“I do Peanut, way better.” Roger smiled at Marie as he emphasized the word way. “What do you like about Ani Peanut?”
Marie finished chewing and swallowed. “She is nice to me daddy, I kind of feel bad I called her a biter, but she said it’s ok, she forgave me. Blair never forgave me daddy. But Ani did.” Marie took another bite of the sandwich and smiled as she chewed.
“I am glad she did Peanut.” Roger said before taking a swig of his water.
“Plus she is beautiful, her hair is so pretty daddy. Don’t you think so daddy?” Marie was already taking a bite of her sandwich as she finished the question.
“I do Peanut, I do agree.” Roger’s eyes wandered, his words half trailed as he was lost in the thought Of Anicka’s beauty.
“Don’t you think daddy?” Marie’s question pulled Roger back from his daydream.
“I’m sorry Peanut, what was the question?” Roger asked.
“I think Ani likes me, Don’t you think daddy?” Marie reasked the question.
“I do Peanut, I think Ani really likes you a lot.” Roger smiled.
“I think she likes you too daddy.” Marie nodded up and down as she put the rest of her sandwich in her mouth, chewed it up, swallowed some water and ran off for the playground, and the swings.
“I think so too Peanut.” Roger said under his breath as he watched his little blonde ball of fire rush off to the playground after having devoured her lunch faster than him.
You rise, you fall, you're down then you rise again
What don't kill you'll make you more strong
It’s the little things in this life, the little things that make you really appreciate what you have. Maybe you’ve heard the expression, the devils in the details, and it really is. Most of us flyby this life only seeing the big things, never seeing those little moments, those moments that define us and we don’t even remember. Do you think Marie is going to remember sitting here telling me how beautiful she thinks Anicka’s hair is when she is 20? Probably not, but at this moment, the impact it has on her, it’s what matters, it’s what counts because of the emotions that it creates in her.
Even as I sit here, watching her swing on the swingset all full of pride, I will remember this moment, she might kind of remember it, but what she will know is that her father loves her. Just like she will not remember anything that Blair did to her, but she will remember that she doesn’t like Blair, she will remember that for some reason, deep down in the back of her mind, her mother hated her. I’m not so evil that I would tell Marie how bad Blair was too her, no I don’t even need too, Marie already knows, even though she doesn’t understand why she knows.
See that is life, that is how it works, we don’t always understand why we feel this way, or that way, all we know is that we do. So everytime I get in that ring, everytime I hear some opponents tell me that I am coddled, protected, that I get special treatment, it makes me laugh. Because they are only seeing what they want to see, they hate me, they don’t even know why. All they know is that their mind is telling them to hate me, it’s a perceived hate out of jealousy, spite, or the simple fact that all their lives they were never good enough to be the best.
“I saw you climb all the way up on your own, then slide down on your own. Good job Peanut, I’m proud of you!” Roger tasseled her hair, grabbed her hand, and the two walked over to a picnic table that had some water bottles, on it, and a lunch bag. They took a seat and Roger pulled out the Ham sandwiches that Anicka had prepared for them, he put one in front of Marie, and one in front of himself. They both dug in.
“I like Anicka.” Marie said, mouthful of sandwich.
Roger finished chewing and swallowed. “Don’t talk with your mouthful Peanut. And I do too.” Roger replied.
“She’s way better than Blair daddy, don’t you think?” This time Marie spoke before taking a bite of her sandwich.
“I do Peanut, way better.” Roger smiled at Marie as he emphasized the word way. “What do you like about Ani Peanut?”
Marie finished chewing and swallowed. “She is nice to me daddy, I kind of feel bad I called her a biter, but she said it’s ok, she forgave me. Blair never forgave me daddy. But Ani did.” Marie took another bite of the sandwich and smiled as she chewed.
“I am glad she did Peanut.” Roger said before taking a swig of his water.
“Plus she is beautiful, her hair is so pretty daddy. Don’t you think so daddy?” Marie was already taking a bite of her sandwich as she finished the question.
“I do Peanut, I do agree.” Roger’s eyes wandered, his words half trailed as he was lost in the thought Of Anicka’s beauty.
“Don’t you think daddy?” Marie’s question pulled Roger back from his daydream.
“I’m sorry Peanut, what was the question?” Roger asked.
“I think Ani likes me, Don’t you think daddy?” Marie reasked the question.
“I do Peanut, I think Ani really likes you a lot.” Roger smiled.
“I think she likes you too daddy.” Marie nodded up and down as she put the rest of her sandwich in her mouth, chewed it up, swallowed some water and ran off for the playground, and the swings.
“I think so too Peanut.” Roger said under his breath as he watched his little blonde ball of fire rush off to the playground after having devoured her lunch faster than him.
You rise, you fall, you're down then you rise again
What don't kill you'll make you more strong
It’s the little things in this life, the little things that make you really appreciate what you have. Maybe you’ve heard the expression, the devils in the details, and it really is. Most of us flyby this life only seeing the big things, never seeing those little moments, those moments that define us and we don’t even remember. Do you think Marie is going to remember sitting here telling me how beautiful she thinks Anicka’s hair is when she is 20? Probably not, but at this moment, the impact it has on her, it’s what matters, it’s what counts because of the emotions that it creates in her.
Even as I sit here, watching her swing on the swingset all full of pride, I will remember this moment, she might kind of remember it, but what she will know is that her father loves her. Just like she will not remember anything that Blair did to her, but she will remember that she doesn’t like Blair, she will remember that for some reason, deep down in the back of her mind, her mother hated her. I’m not so evil that I would tell Marie how bad Blair was too her, no I don’t even need too, Marie already knows, even though she doesn’t understand why she knows.
See that is life, that is how it works, we don’t always understand why we feel this way, or that way, all we know is that we do. So everytime I get in that ring, everytime I hear some opponents tell me that I am coddled, protected, that I get special treatment, it makes me laugh. Because they are only seeing what they want to see, they hate me, they don’t even know why. All they know is that their mind is telling them to hate me, it’s a perceived hate out of jealousy, spite, or the simple fact that all their lives they were never good enough to be the best.
The dawn, the death, the fight to the final breath
What don't kill you'll make you more strong
The dawn, the death, the fight to the final breath
What don't kill you'll make you more strong
See none of y’all truly understand what I go through, well maybe a few, but the truth is, it isn’t all talent. I put in more effort than you, I work harder, I train harder, and I never quit. That’s the secret, you want to climb into a ring with me, be better than me, than you have to work harder than me, put in more time than me, because this isn’t something I do on the side, this is my life, this is what I live for.
No one tells me what to do at an Ignite show, no one scripts out the decisions I make, they are mine, I decide how it goes. So while you are sitting there in the locker room twiddling your thumbs, saying oh hum why don’t people talk about me, why don’t I get pushed by the management, I am out there doing what has to be done. I put in the work, I put my own name out there, I make sure the fans see me. There is no Roger Wright waiting around hoping that someone will ask him if he wants to be on camera, no I go find the camera man, I tell him to follow me, and I create a moment.
So when you sit there and you wonder what it takes to be the NEW World Champion, it’s an easy answer. DEDICATION. It’s not just about showing up and trying to put on a good show, no you have to get into the ring, make a mark. Force the world to see you, take the initiative, put yourself in the right spot and take what you think you deserve. If you get knocked on your ass, get back up, show the world that you aren’t a fucking quitter. Use that pain, take it and turn it into something else, because that is what it takes to hold the NEW World Title.
So when you sit in that locker room twiddling your thumbs, wondering why, now you can’t say you don’t know, because I just told all of you, gave you all the ingredients to getting somewhere in this business. So when I see you all in that cluster at the rumble, show me what you learned, make me regret what I had to say here, make me wish that I didn’t tell you the secret, otherwise when it’s all over, I’ll be the man y’all wish you were, the man with his hand raised. And all of you will still be that guy, asking himself why, why don’t I get the same chances that Roger does.
Breaking your teeth on the hard life a-coming
Show your scars
Cutting your feet on the hard earth running
Show your scars
Breaking your life, broken, beat and scarred
But we die hard!
“DADDY!!!!!!” Marie’s screams sent Roger running, he had seen the impending fall coming, watched as she tried to walk across the metal beam, only to fall to the ground with a hard thud.
“Where does it hurt Peanut?” Roger asked as he checked her for bruises. She simply pointed at her knee, to a spot that was red and already starting to show a little sign of swelling. Roger scooped her up. “It’s ok Peanut, daddy knows just what to do.” Roger carried Marie to Ani’s house, pushed the door open and set Marie on the couch.
In the kitchen he grabbed a bag of peas and a towel, wrapped the towel around the peas and returned to place them on Marie’s knee. “Ani thought she heard you two, what happened?” Ani half pushed Roger out of the way, removing the peas and towel to look at Maries knee. “It’s ok, Ani will make it better.” She leaned down, gave Marie’s knee a soft kiss and returned the towel and ice to Marie’s knee. “Better?” Ani asked.
Marie nodded, small droplets of tears build up on her cheeks. “Thank you Ani.” Marie choked out as Ani bent down and gave her a hug. As she stood up she looked at Roger, the question clear and present on her face, what happened? The two stepped out the front door, letting it slowly shut behind them.
“She was walking the balance beam, doing well, i was just finishing my sandwich, and I saw it, but was too far away.” Roger half hung his head in shame.
“It’s ok, kids fall all the time, Ani knows, she was five too once.” Ani reached out and gave Roger a hug, he embraced her back, exhaling a deep breath.
LATER THAT NIGHT
On the rooftop balcony of Ani’s little ivory tower in the compound, Roger sat in Ani’s chair, Ani curled up in his lap, her right hand playing with his hair as her head rested on his shoulder. “The other day, when you gave Dane the keys to the motorcycle back.”
Ani nustled Roger, “mhm.” She purred into his ear.
“When I talked to Allie, I...she’s going to need you Ani.” Roger’s hand came up and rubbed the back of Ani’s head, and settled down on her left shoulder.
“Allie is strong, Ani helped her become strong, she’s been through this before.” Ani whispered to Roger as she continued to play with his hair. “Ani is curious what Allie said tho.” Roger rested his cheek against the top of her head and began to tell the story.
LAST WEEK
“Why don’t I go talk with Allison. I think you and Dane have a few things to catch up on.” Roger said as he moved away from Dane and Ani, towards Allie who has stopped and is rather upset. “I know I’m probably not the one you want to talk to right now.” Roger stops as he sees the hurt in Allison’s eyes, small tears welled up in each corner.
“He doesn’t see it, doesn’t get it, we have kids and he wants to go off…” She trailed off, fighting back the tears, a small stream on either side had formed and was running down her cheeks, her make up running with the tears.
“It’s never easy to see our own mistakes, even the strongest of men need someone to show them their weakness.” Roger placed his right hand gently on her shoulder, she looked up at him, tears still welling up before releasing down her cheeks.
“He thinks it's just like before, but it isn’t, it’s different this time. It’s like he cares more about that damn bottle and bike than he does about what is right in front of him. I can’t watch him destroy what he has, I won’t!”
“It’s always easier to give up on them, but he needs a rock, something to tie him to what he has, to remind him of what he can lose, Allison he loves you, and now more than ever he truly needs you. I’ve walked that path, it’s never easy to come back from.” Roger gave a small faint smile to her.
“We have too, but it’s different this time, we have kids now, we have…” She trailed off again, Roger could see the pain in her eyes and pulled her in close knowing what she really needed was just a hug, and a chance to just cry.
After a moment, they released, Allison wiped her eyes. “Thank you.” She said, doing all she could to steady herself. The two stood there for a moment in silence watching the exchange between Dane and Anicka, Allison finally deciding she was composed moved towards Dane.
Allison stopped next to Ani, caught Dane’s eyes and tossed him the keys, he was barely able to catch them. “I love you, Dane. But I think it’s best if you stay somewhere else for a while. Just until you get through...whatever this is.” Her voice was shaky, but stronger than it had been before. Her, Ani, and Roger make their way back to the house.
BACK TO THE ROOFTOP PORCH
“Ani thinks you are a good man cowboy, a good man.” Ani nestled up to his neck and gave him a kiss on his cheek. The two sat in silence for a long minute, and Roger kissed her forehead.
“I try.” Roger whispered as he could tell that Ani had fallen asleep. He stood up Holding her in his arms, and carried her to the bedroom, she was already wearing her long night shirt. He slipped her into the bed, working the covers up over her. He stripped down, slipped into the bed on the other side, and as he just got comfortable on his back, Ani rolled over, and squeezed him tight like he was her sleep pillow.
THE NEXT DAY IN THE AFTERNOON
Roger sat on the steps outside of Ani’s Ivory tower, Marie was off with the twins, and Allison and Ani were training. Roger had done cardio for the day, running laps around the compound. Right now he sat waiting, Ani would be home anytime soon. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Allison walking by, she smiled at him and stopped, Roger stood up to greet her.
“Afternoon Allison, how was training?” He asked trying to make some small talk. The only other time he had talked to Allison alone was when she was crying the week before.
“I am good, Ani was just talking with Voo, she will be along shortly.” Allison scanned him up and down, as if trying to see him through somewhat clear eyes now. “Tell me, this thing with Ani, is it just a thing?”
Roger could feel her staring at him, analyzing him for more than just what he said, and he didn’t even realize he was smiling at the mere mention of Ani’s name. “No, I’ve asked myself that question everyday since it started, and no, it is something more than just a thing.”
“You hurt her.” Allison started.
“Then I deserve what you guys do to me.” Roger didn’t even let her finish. “If I hurt her, I will deserve everything that comes my way, won’t even fight it.” The mere idea of it hurt Roger, his smile faded, the happiness fell away.
“You really do just want to make her happy, don't you?” Allison smiled wide and gave Roger a hug. “Thank you.”
“Should Ani be worried?” Ani came strutting up to find Allison and Roger just releasing the hug.
“No, not at all, I just had to ask him some questions.” Allison smiled and walked away.
“Ani sure would like to know what that was about?” She eyed Roger up and down. “Relax cowboy, Ani knows she’s not your type.” Anicka winked at him and gave him a big hug followed by a deep passionate kiss.
“You sure are loved Ms. Swan.” Roger said as Ani took his hand and led him into the house.
“People care about Ani, they are family, you always love family.” She said, as they strode into the bedroom and she began to peel off her work out gear.
“Pure Beauty.” The words escaped Roger’s lips as he watched her getting ready for the shower.
“Coming cowboy?” She asked as the water in the shower began to run.
“Yes I am my beauty.” Roger stripped off his close entered the bathroom, and shut the door behind him.