Post by Deleted on Mar 29, 2013 9:44:46 GMT -6
L.A. Kief is in bed still, he has been in bed ever since he lost the TV title, he is very depressed about it. Pugh and Inkt had to care for him, they had to feed, wash him and change his Depends. I can’t swear to this, but I think Inkt did a stink hole with his pinky, but anyways. They had enough, they want Kief out of bed.
“Get up you lazy fatass!!” One of them shouted at Kief. Kief didn’t know which one it was and you humans look alike to me. Another one shouted: “Get your ass out of bed and stop crying you piss of human turd!” Kief just wrapped the blankets around him tighter and shut out the world. They just gave up and let him stay in his on filth. Tough loving.
Now comes the dream part of anything. Or is it a dream?
A voice that came from nowhere and everywhere begin to sound out, it had a limey accent to it.
“FATTY!” The voice said. “FATTY!!!” The voice called out once again. “HEY YOU BLOODY GIT! Get your over ripe ass out of the bed!” L.A. Kief recognize the voice immediately. It was his old tag team partner Chino aka Skinny, they were Fatty and Skinny the best tag team in BWA and World Tag Champion until they got screwed over.
“Chino?” Kief said weakly as his head peers out from under the covers. What he saw was amazing it was his old partner Chino, but he was wearing a brightly colored yellow dress which in itself wasn’t weird, the weird part was the fairy wings coming out of his shoulder blades. “What..the..?”
“Damn right you minger, I’m your Fairy Godmother, bitch!” Chino flies and hovers over L.A. Kief bed, he takes out his penis and piss all over it. “HAHAHA!! Fatty and Skinny back together again!!” Kief slowly get out of the bed.
“Chino, I luv you man, I really do but, I can’t do this right now.”
“Fatty, you’re my penis filled fruitcake, you need to do this now. Why else am I here, well figuratively here, the real me is chatting up the slag. Speaking of slag you still got a thing for the ginger mingers?”
“Yeah, I guess so.” Kief said sadly. “Chino why are you here. I’m depressed I lost the TV title, I couldn’t even get past my first title defense.”
Suddenly Chino backhands Kief, Kief goes flying across the room letting out a girlish scream as he went.
“Where is the Fatty I used to know? The old Fatty didn’t used to care about titles, about losing, about winning! The old Fatty cared about one thing only, pissing people off! So what you lost the belt in one week, the old you would be happy about it! The old you would be laughing about it! The old you would be wanting to win that title back just so you can lose it again in a week. What I happen to the old you?”
Kief looks up at Chino and tears begin to form. “I grew up a bit!” Now Kief is bawling.” Chino being the loving fairy godmother that he is backed hand him again. Kief cried yet again like a baby getting raped by a shotgun.
“See! And that is your downfall mate. When the last time you Jewshamed someone?”
“NEVER!!!” Kief cried out in pain.
Chino shook his had in disgust. “You are just a shell of a man that you once were. Do you know who you are fighting this week?” Chino asked hopefully. L.A. Kief looks up at Chino and grin slightly.
“No.” Chino broke out in a huge grin.
“That’s my boy! Who cares who you are fighting! They don’t matter! Pop into there house and replace their mayonnaise with semen! Poop in their bath tub! Rape their mums! Finger their pets! Kill their best friends! Do all the stuff we used to do and sit back and laugh when they claim it never happen or that it was an actor! Be the best Kief you used to be! Bring back Kate Reno, bring in Zombie Jesus, bring in the BWA Panda, rename him to whatever this lame ass fed is called! You need people to play off of! You can’t just relay on the Sexy Bitchz, cool name bro. Even though Homolicous would be better.”
True it would, Homolicous strikes fear in the heart of over the top straight mean and republicans.
“Chino, I don’t think I have what it take to go back to what I once was. It was another time and place. This is different. I like it here, don’t want to piss people off.”
“FUCK THEM IF THEY CAN’T TAKE A JOKE!” Chino yelled to the high heavens. “ You aren’t doing your job if you aren’t pissing them off. Have you drawn the owner as a big dick yet?”
“No.” Another smack another yell.
“Idiot.”
“Chino, I don’t know if I can piss people off here, this is a really sick group, we had one guy screwing his own sister.”
“Incest is best. M I RITE?”
“U R RITE.”
Kief thinks for a bit. “Okay I’m bored with you now. Going to try to get some sleep.” And with that Chino disappears.
A little while later though...or another night....
"2 am, why can't I sleep?" L.A. Kief asked himself.
Because you dumb fuck you are overloaded with caffeine. I gently reminded him.
"Oh, yeah. I sure did drank a lot of that today, that explains it." Kief, said. "I'm bored I need adventure!"
Kief got out of bed and went to see, if any of the Sexy Bitchz are up. Pugh was passed out with a empty bucket of KFC lying on his tummy, Inkt was also passed out, but with a Muscle and Fitness magazine lying over his cock and balls. They weren't going to play with him.
"Oh shucks." Kief said sadly. "Oh well, time for adventure without them." Kief went to the window and open it, he jumped out, but of course this is L.A. Kief, so after heading in a downward spiral he flew off, to adventures unknown.
Soon Kief found himself in a strange town, he went into the first bar that he saw, it was nearly empty, except for a few drunks and some ugly meth head whores. He was looking around when he saw her, a pretty one, she stood out from the rest. Raven black hair, gorgeous eyes and a killer rack to boot. Kief put on the charms and went over to chat her up.
"Hello, sex puppet, I'm the ever lovable Kief, and who might you be beside, my future dick warmer?"
She smiles at Kief suave ways, he can melt a frozen whale heart.
"I'm surprised you don't recognized me, I'm quite infamous, that why I'm alone here, I'm Casey."
"Hello Casey, nice to meet such a hot piece of sexiness such as yourself. That's funny that you said you are infamous, I'm famous, I'm a professional wrestler, wrestling for the hottest fed in town, NEW. I was until recently a champion, sure it was a low belt, but hey a champion in a champion. And I'm sure once I beat my opponents this week, I will get another shot at that belt or perhaps another one. So what did you do that made you infamous?"
Casey smiles a sexy wicked smile. "Well they said I killed my own child. Even if I did does that make me a bad person?"
Kief thought about this. "Babe, your so damn foxy, you could have killed the Brady Bunch, and I still would want to bang you like a cheap drum set." He said quite honestly.
Casey smirks at that. "You are just saying that so you can get in my snatch. I don't care though, it's been way to long since I rode a meat hammer. So lets get out of here."
Kief smiles. "Before I give you the hot Kief injection, how are you downtown? I ain't no bush master, if you know what I mean."
Legitimate question to asked.
"I'm as bald as baby."
"Sweet, just the way I like it. I saw an orphanage a block or so back. If you want we can murder some more babies, if you want. No one will miss them, they are throwaways.
"OHHH, all that killing baby talk is making me wet."
"Well, goo goo ga ga baby, goo goo ga ga"
So off Kief goes to make some sweet loving to this Casey woman, whoever she may be.